The Heretic
by L. Emmist
Summary: Annoying little sisters, helmacrons who can morph, and a whole lot of Yeerks! We've got trouble! -- PG-13 for action. Enjoy Chapter Twenty-Nine! --
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer:  
  
This just in! A recent study shows that L. Emmist does not own Animorphs in character or concept. Mr. Emmist was unavailable for comment, but his press secretary, one Elmira Pickleworthy, informed our sources that, "Mr. Emmist was aware of this. His works are an expression of appreciation for all KA Applegate has done. He should not be construed as owning or believing to own these items, and he should definitely not be sued." Thus far, Ms. Applegate, the original authoress of the Animorphs books, has pressed no charges. Ms. Pickleworthy relates L. Emmist's reaction as "grateful." We have also been informed that L. Emmist does not own any of the other copyrighted or trademarked items he has mentioned in his works, and is not making any money off of them. Again, Ms. Pickleworthy emphasizes that Mr. Emmist would "prefer not to be sued."  
  
Note:  
  
You really should read "The Wheel," before beginning this. While "The Heretic" isn't a sequel as such, it is set shortly after "The Wheel," and so summarizes the plot - including major twists - of that story.  
  
This story has a permanent "To Be Continued . . . " attached to the end of each chapter, until you see the words, "The End." After that, beg and plead as you might, the story has concluded. Before that, beg and plead as you might, the story goes on.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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THE HERETIC  
  
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Chapter One:  
  
  
  
"You are SO not in charge of me, Rachel!" Jordan screamed, hurling her shoe at my face.  
  
Hi. I'm Rachel. Yeah, that Rachel. The one who turns into animals in order to fight alien slugs. The one dealing with a seriously irate little sister.  
  
I caught the shoe, and dropped it. A couple years of battle will heighten your reflexes just a little. "Look, Jordan, calm down."  
  
"No!" she shouted, climbing up onto the couch. She does that when we're arguing. Maybe it's to be taller than me. Maybe it's so she can escape when I lose my not-so-very-good-temper. "I can go if I want to!"  
  
"Jordan, I'm telling you that it's a bad idea. That girl is trouble!"  
  
Jordan sat down on the back of the couch, her arms folded and a deep scowl on her face. "Look, Big Sister," she said, squeezing every drop of sarcasm she could into the name, "I'm thirteen years old! I can make decisions about what to do and where to go by myself, without bodyguards watching everything I do! I'm *grown* *up*, don't you get that?"  
  
Grown up. Right. My parents aren't even grown up. You don't grow up until you've lived the kind of life I have. Then you grow up way too fast.  
  
For those who haven't been paying attention, Earth is under attack by Yeerks. My friends and I are the only ones who can stop them. We do this by morphing into any animal we touch. Big Mama Earth has provided quite an arsenal for us over the course of the war. According to the Andalites - supposedly the "good guys" of the universe - we shouldn't even have this ability. Well, we do. Boo-hoo. If the Andalites would hurry up and get here and kick the Yeerks off our planet, we wouldn't need to use their technology.  
  
Right now, though, I wasn't involved with any dire mission. We had hurt the Yeerks badly by ruining this great plan to infest everybody who went through Driver's Ed. Well, I shouldn't say "we." More like, my friends. I was under control by one of those Yeerks I've been talking about. Couldn't move, couldn't blink on my own. Couldn't tell Tobias that it wasn't me talking to him, but someone, some*thing* that wanted to see him dead. Fortunately, Marco had been able to salvage the mission. I had gotten free, the Yeerks still thought we were Andalite bandits, and their new holographic projector was destroyed.  
  
We also took out the town's main water tower in the process, but that really couldn't be helped. There was a citywide emergency declared, and water had been rationed and regulated for about three weeks. You couldn't take more than a two-minute shower. Couldn't brush your teeth without water. No cooking with water, where possibly avoidable. And you don't even want to hear about the toilet situation. We had all gotten pretty grungy over those three weeks.  
  
It was because the water regulations had just been discontinued that Jordan and I were having this fight. Saint Patrick's day was on Wednesday, but there was a *serious* heat wave in town, for that time of year. It was upwards of eighty degrees out. One of the girls Jordan knew, Megan, was throwing a pool party. They were going to have waterfights, water-drinking contests, sprinkler-jumping contests . . . all the ways they could think of to waste the water they were now allowed to use again. Picture my friend Ax the Andalite, at Cinnabon. That's about the level of excitement we're talking here.  
  
All of which would be good and fine, if it weren't Megan hosting the party.  
  
See, I know Megan. I used to be friends with her, before my Yeerk-crushing days. For some reason, she befriended the troublemakers and rowdy crowd at our school. Not long after I started spending my weeknights ripping apart Hork-Bajir guards, she gained a reputation for being a party girl. Then she went a little further. Her image grew. Because people expected her to be worse, she acted with even less self-control, which, in turn, led to a worse reputation. The whole thing basically snowballed until Megan was one of the people that smart students Avoided. Yeah, with a capital A.  
  
And she was throwing this party that Jordan was dying to go to. The way Megan was now, I was laying on the odds heavy that there would be hard drinks, hard drugs, and . . . well, it would probably be the kind of party Jordan really shouldn't attend. Yet, for some reason, she was dead set on the idea. I think it involved a boy who would be going, but I'm really not sure. The point was, no way on Earth was I going to let Jordan go.  
  
"You're grown up?" I snorted. "Sure, right. That's why you threw a fit when Mom almost gave Mrs. Peekaboo to that Salvation Army guy."  
  
"That was two weeks ago!"  
  
"Oh, and what, you've grown up since then?" I was beginning to get really tired of this argument.  
  
"Look," she grated, "I told Mom that I was going to a pool party on Friday. She said okay. The paperwork has all been filed, Rachel!"  
  
"Then I'll just go and tell Mom a little bit about Megan, and maybe she'll reconsider." I didn't want to have to do that. There were things I knew about Megan I had sworn I would never tell anybody. To protect Jordan, I was willing to break that oath, but if I could get out of it . . .  
  
"If you tell Mom about Megan, I'll tell her about the last twelve times you snuck out."  
  
"If you tell her about that, I'll tell Marco you think he's cute."  
  
"If you tell him, I'll tell Mom you've been cheating on those math tests."  
  
"I haven't been cheating!" I protested.  
  
She snorted. "You spend zero time studying, Rachel. Zip. You barely scramble through your homework every day. It's utterly impossible for you to get A's like you do without cheating."  
  
Boy, was she observant. I'd have to be more careful about her. "I have a great memory," I said.  
  
"Uh-huh."  
  
"Listen," I sighed. "You really don't want to go to this party. Megan is bad news. You know that! Don't make me get ugly."  
  
"You already *are* ugly," she sneered.  
  
"Yeah, yeah," I grunted. "Bottom line? You are *not* going to go to this party."  
  
"Bottom line?" she shot back, "I am."  
  
The ringing phone interrupted our glaring contest. I ripped it off the hook, scowling. "Yeah?"  
  
"Hey, Rachel! It's Jake. Some of us were thinking it might be fun to get together."  
  
Great. Just what I needed. Some mission to complicate my already frustrating life.  
  
"Today?" I asked.  
  
"Whenever. We were thinking Wednesday. Just to hang out. Does your family have any plans for St. Patrick's Day?"  
  
I couldn't tell if he was talking about a mission, or if he really meant what he said.  
  
"No, we don't. Let me know the details." I punched the off button. During our conversation, Jordan had climbed down off the couch. She lifted her backpack to her shoulder with a smirk. I pointed at her menacingly, "You're not going."  
  
"Sure, Rachel," she smiled. "Whatever you say." Then she turned and pounded up the stairs.  
  
Something in her little brain had clicked, and she thought she had won the argument. That happens a lot, and it's the main reason I avoid fights with her. As far as she was concerned, all was settled and she was definitely going. Her plan was simple. Placate the rabid older sister until Friday night, then split.  
  
Problem is, I'm one older sister who isn't that easily dismissed. And I'm one older sister who can turn into an elephant and end a party real fast. 


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two:  
  
"So?" Cassie prompted, kicking her locker open.  
  
"So what?" I grunted.  
  
It was Monday afternoon. Flex time. Why is that while school gets longer and harder, recess gets squashed from an hour and a half to three minutes? Who came up with this whole school idea, anyway?  
  
"So, what did Jake say when you talked to him about Jordan going to the party?"  
  
I frowned, and rearranged the books in my locker.  
  
Cassie snapped her locker door shut and frowned up at me. "You didn't talk to him, did you?"  
  
Since I had mentioned Jordan's desire to go to the party, Cassie had encouraged me to talk to Jake about it. Actually, not just encouraged. More like demanded, commanded, begged, and pleaded. She seemed to think that my cousin would have this miracle answer that would solve everything. Sorry, not likely. I folded my arms, really wishing she would drop the subject. "Look, Cassie, this isn't exactly an emergency. I mean, there are none of . . . " I glanced around at the sea of students, then lowered my voice, " . . . of *them* involved."  
  
"So it shouldn't be a problem for you to mention it to Jake, right?"  
  
I groaned, and banged my head against the lockers. Cassie wasn't giving up easily.  
  
"Come on!" she urged. "We can come up with some plan to stop her from going. This party is just as dangerous to her as . . . other things."  
  
Actually, she did have a point. I agreed with her. A party like that? Drink, drugs, etc? If it became any kind of pattern, it could mess up Jordan's life just as bad as the Yeerks would. I mean, what do Yeerks do to you? Take away your dignity? Your control? Your self-respect? Your free will?  
  
Bingo.  
  
Yeah, I'm kind of down on the whole party life. Sorry, all you wild party- people. I guess my party animal spirit, if I ever had one, was killed along with this guy called Elfangor.  
  
"I'm not arguing that, Cassie," I said. "But this isn't a life-and-death thing! It's a matter of . . . of . . . "  
  
"Of life as Jordan or life as Megan, Model Two."  
  
Ouch. One thing about Cassie, she knows to hit where it hurts when she wants to.  
  
"Besides," she continued, "how do we know this isn't a Yeerk operation? Yeerks have a lot of ways of infesting people." I knew she was thinking about the truck where she was infested. "We should find out if Megan is a . . . you know." She let her voice fall at the last sentence as someone pulled open the locker next to hers.  
  
I nodded, and jerked my head away from the general flow of students. We shut our lockers and squeezed up against the wall, cradling our books. Passing students would have thought we were talking about a test, a teacher, some guy, maybe a new movie.  
  
They probably didn't figure we were discussing whether or not it was necessary to turn into animals in order to bust up a pool party my sister wanted to attend, on the off-chance that the whole thing might be a ploy designed by evil alien slugs to take over human brains.  
  
Probably.  
  
"Okay, so, we ask Erek if she's one of *them*," I muttered.  
  
She shook her head. "We should talk to Jake first, Rachel. Really, I'm serious. If you don't talk to him, I will. We need to be careful, here."  
  
Cassie was still a little gun-shy from her time as a Controller. Totally understandable, if occasionally annoying. Actually, it was the same for me. I had spent the first couple days after "my" Yeerk died, obsessively washing out my ear. Being a Controller isn't exactly a picnic.  
  
"Okay, so we get Jake's permission, *then* ask Erek," I said, rolling my eyes slightly. "And if she's a you-know-what, we move. But I'm going to have a backup plan in case she isn't."  
  
"What kind of backup plan?"  
  
"Don't worry," I smiled, "I swear it won't involve twisted steel or explosions."  
  
"Glad to hear it." The bell rang. I began to head to class, but Cassie grabbed my arm. "When?" she demanded.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"When will you talk to Jake?"  
  
"Later," I promised.  
  
"What time?"  
  
I groaned. She wasn't going to let me wimp out on this. "I'll talk to him when school lets out."  
  
"Right after school lets out?"  
  
The hallways were beginning to drain of students. Shoot, I was going to be late!  
  
"Yes, okay? Right after school."  
  
"Where?"  
  
"Let go!" I snapped, shaking her off and jogging down the hallway.  
  
"Where?" she called after me.  
  
I ground my teeth in irritation. It's a pain in the neck, sometimes, to have a best friend who knows when to be pushy and bossy. She was doing it for my own good, I knew that. Still, I wanted to put her in traction. "The bike racks!" I called, and rounded the corner.  
  
Luckily, Study Hall was my next class, so the teacher really didn't care much when I came in late. I got the mandatory verbal reprimand, but I've got a good reputation as far as punctuality goes. It's a good thing, too, because a detention at that point would have pretty much pushed me over the top.  
  
See, I have this little problem with anger and aggression. And at the moment, despite the fact that I knew Cassie was helping me, and that I would be grateful later, I still felt like hitting something. Repeatedly. Until that something was no longer recognizable as anything but wreckage.  
  
Well, at least Cassie would be late to class, too.  
  
I dropped into my seat. This guy behind me, Robert, had his feet propped up on the bookrack under my desk. He was bouncing them, so my whole chair was vibrating to the rhythm of a Creed tune.  
  
I had just bought these great shoes the week before. You know the type. Big, brown, with heels the size of Montana. I brought them down on Robert's wiggling feet with about half the force I wanted to.  
  
His yelp of pain made the class titter.  
  
I got some consolation from that. 


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three:  
  
  
  
We have two bike racks at our school. One, the only one every really used, is out front, near where the buses come in. Kids are always getting in trouble for riding their bikes too fast, too near the buses. When not swarmed by all the cyclists in the school, it's a popular hangout for the more troublesome crowd. A cloud of cigarette smoke clings to it like an ugly ghost.  
  
I wasn't looking at Cassie's face when I told her to meet me at the bike rack, but I'm sure she was surprised.  
  
As school let out, I faithfully headed to the bike rack.  
  
The other bike rack.  
  
Rack number two is on the edge of the back faculty parking lot. It used to be out front. One winter, our school custodian was plowing the parking lot and he mangled it beyond repair. For tax and paperwork and union reasons, the school couldn't just trash the old rack. So they paid some student thirty bucks to hacksaw it off the concrete and move it back to rear of the building. It was rusty, twisted, and ugly. Most freshmen mistook it for garbage from when our school was expanding.  
  
A van obscured my view of the bike rack. I couldn't see if Jake and Cassie were there, but I crossed my fingers and hoped they weren't. That way, I could honor my agreement to go to the rack after school, but I still wouldn't have to talk to Jake about the party.  
  
You may be wondering why I was so anxious to avoid the conversation. To be honest, I was wondering that myself.  
  
It basically boils down to this: I didn't want to look scared.  
  
For the first week after we had been infested, Cassie and I were both really skittish. Everything looked like a Yeerk trap, everyone was a Controller. I passed up an opportunity to go on a fifty-dollar spending spree in the mall. Me. I did. Because I figured they would infest me at American Eagle. I had shown myself to be weak, and I needed to kill that image. Like Jake had said, it was understandable. That didn't make it acceptable. On our little team, it's my job to be the tough one. I hadn't been tough. I intended to start again.  
  
That was why I didn't want to talk to Jake. I didn't want to go crying to him. "Oh, Jake, boo-hoo, I'm scared 'cause my baby sister wants to go to a party!" Not the Rachel I wanted people to see. Not the Rachel I wanted to be.  
  
Cassie was still leery of everything. I had come out of my fear quicker, because I had to. Cassie can afford to be sensitive and to need time to heal. That's her job.  
  
Not me. Nope, it's the Bounce-Back-Rachel, with the all-new Karate-Chop Action! Xena can't show a moment of weakness, or else all of civilization as we know it comes crashing down around her ears.  
  
Yeah, just a little bitter here.  
  
Occasionally, you need some time to heal. I hadn't gotten any.  
  
I eyed the van in front of me with a frown. With any luck whatsoever, Cassie and Jake wouldn't realize that I had meant this other bike rack. I mean, nobody ever talked about it, or thought about it. There would be absolutely no reason for Cassie to come here.  
  
"Hi, Rachel!"  
  
Sometimes I really hate how well Cassie knows me.  
  
"Hi, Cassie. Hi, Jake."  
  
"Hey," Jake said. He was sitting on the rack, kicking his feet slowly. "So, what's the problem, Rachel?" He spoke slowly, patiently, like he was waiting for a burst of rage or tears.  
  
Obviously, Cassie had prepped him for this little get-together.  
  
I gave him neither anger nor sorrow. "There's no problem," I began. "It's just this dumb argument Jordan and I are having."  
  
"What argument?"  
  
"She wants to go to a party . . . "  
  
"A *Megan*-party," Cassie interjected.  
  
" . . . and I don't think she should." I shrugged, like I could care less. "It's no big deal. Cassie was overreacting a little, that's all."  
  
Cassie gave me a reproachful look for that. Jake swung his big feet again, then looked over at Cassie. In exactly the same tone he had addressed me, he said, "So, what's the problem, Cassie?"  
  
"The problem is," she said, pouncing on the invitation to make her point, "that this party is dangerous. Not just because it could be a Yeerk trap," she added hastily, "but because even normal parties of this nature are damaging. You know what happens at a Megan-party, Jake."  
  
"Yeah," he said. He was silent for a minute. "So the concern here is that Jordan will either get infested or get addicted. Neither of which we want."  
  
"Basically," Cassie said.  
  
"Rachel?" Jake asked.  
  
"Yeah," I grunted. "That's pretty much it."  
  
"Okay. I'll talk to Erek and find out if Megan is a Controller. If she is, we go in all bears roaring." He smiled at me. "If she's not, we let Rachel handle it. Sound good?"  
  
"Fine," I affirmed.  
  
Cassie shifted her weight uncomfortably. "I guess," she said tentatively.  
  
"Good," said Jake. "I'll just call Erek and we can meet up tonight in the barn, if she is." He slid off the bike rack, then paused. "Oh, no, wait. Today's Monday."  
  
"So?"  
  
"Erek's doing volunteer work at that big animal shelter outside of town. They're having an Adopt-A-Thon. The place is gonna be a zoo. No pun intended."  
  
"We can't call and ask for him?" Cassie probed.  
  
Jake shook his head. "Erek said we won't be able to get in touch with him at all."  
  
"Well, we can ask Mr. King, right?"  
  
For the slow students: Erek the Chee is an ancient android that goes to our high school. The Chee came to the neighborhood back in, oh, the caveman days. They use highly sophisticated hologram technology to look like normal people. Every Chee has lived hundreds or thousands of human lives. The Chee replace us during extended missions, like when we're starving slugs out of our heads. They also keep tabs on pretty much everything the Yeerks do. Mr. King is the current name of the android that is playing the role of Erek's dad. Got it? Good.  
  
"No, he's on a business trip. And we don't know for sure who the other Chee are. I'll call him tonight, but I probably won't be able to get back to you until school tomorrow."  
  
"Fine," I shrugged. "Are we done?"  
  
"Yeah, we're done," Jake said.  
  
"Good." I turned and walked away.  
  
"Hey, Rachel?" Jake called.  
  
I turned impatiently. "Yeah?"  
  
"You're not weak."  
  
I guess I'm not the best at hiding my feelings. Unlike Jake or Ax or even Marco, I can't just pretend away my frustration. I couldn't just make them believe that I wasn't ashamed of how useless I'd been during the last mission. How helpless.  
  
"That's the point, Jake. I'm not weak." 


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four:  
  
  
  
"I'm not kidding," Marco snorted. "The bruise was this big!" He held up his hands, indicating the size of the bruise on Robert's foot.  
  
What were you doing looking at Robert's feet? Tobias asked.  
  
"He was showing everybody in gym. Rachel, next time you want to be left alone at school, just wear those shoes. Dey ah dee intimadaytohs!" he intoned, affecting a Schwarzenegger accent.  
  
"If only they would work on you," I mused.  
  
"Yeah, right. You're talking to the kid who stares Hork-Bajir guards in the eye and laughs. I'm not about to start crying because of your boots."  
  
"I never heard you laughing at them, Marco. Whimpering in terror, yeah. Not laughing."  
  
We were in Cassie's barn. Business was slow in the Wildlife Rehabilitation Clinic, so Cassie was mucking out a stall instead of bandaging weasels or sticking needles into unsuspecting ducks. Tobias was, you guessed it, perched in the rafters. The rest of us were scattered around the barn. Since it was Tuesday afternoon and Cassie's dad was home, Ax was in another stall, ready to duck out of sight and morph should it become necessary.  
  
"What I really want to know is how you bent your leg so your feet could get under the book rack of your own desk. Did you half-morph squid or something?"  
  
"Marco," I purred, "some of us just have longer and more flexible legs than others. You're the only one here whose feet don't touch the ground when you sit at your desk."  
  
"Hah. Hah. And here I thought I was the only comedian in the club."  
  
"Actually, Rachel, I was wondering the same thing," Cassie said. "How did you do that?"  
  
"Well, I didn't bring my foot straight down. More like kicked back. And I was in one of those new gray desks, with the book racks farther forward."  
  
"Gotcha."  
  
"For the record, Rachel," Jake said, "you should try to avoid bruising anybody, in the future."  
  
"I didn't mean to give him a bruise," I protested.  
  
"You meant to kick him," Jake reproached, then continued before I had a chance to defend myself. "If we're all finished reviewing the saga of Robert's bruise, we'll return to our regularly scheduled Animorphs meeting."  
  
Do let's, Tobias said dryly.  
  
"I talked to Erek about Megan last night. He told me that she's not a member of the Sharing."  
  
"So she's not a Controller," I said, glancing at Cassie.  
  
"Not necessarily, but we can't jump to conclusions," Jake cautioned. "According to Erek, not all Controllers are part of the Sharing. Most Controllers who have bad reputations or live as criminals aren't part of the Sharing. The Yeerks don't want the negative press."  
  
That makes sense, Ax interjected. While access to the illicit element of society would permit increased opportunities for infestation and nefarious operations, they maintain a respectable surface element to procure influence in higher spheres.   
  
We stared at him. Ax has a tendency to use big words, but this was quite a doozy of a sentence, even for him.  
  
Ax, Tobias smiled, you know how I said you should read the thesaurus to get a better scope of the human language?   
  
Yes?   
  
Forget what I said. I think you picked the wrong words to memorize.   
  
I chose the most interesting words, he mumbled huffily.  
  
"Annnnyway," Jake interrupted, "the deal is, we don't know whether Megan is a Controller or not."  
  
"So what does that mean?" I asked.  
  
Marco leaned forward, smirking. "It means we don't know whether Megan is a Controller or -- ouch!"  
  
The shoes I was wearing weren't quite as good for stomping as my new boots. They were good enough.  
  
"It means that, for now, we've got to act under the assumption that Megan *is* a Controller," Jake said.  
  
"Which means that we've got to invade a wild pool party! Yeehaw!" Marco exulted. Then, at a look from Cassie and I: "I mean, 'Oh, dear. This requires careful planning.'"  
  
"Mm-hmm," Cassie grunted.  
  
"Any plans for keeping Jordan Yeerk-free?" Jake prompted.  
  
"Sure," I shrugged. "We go in with battle morphs, rip up the party, send everybody home screaming."  
  
"I love the elegance of your plans, Rachel," Marco sneered. "*If* we were to do that, and *if* we were to survive, don't you think people might wonder just why the traveling circus decided to crash the gates?"  
  
Driven mad by the heat? Tobias suggested.  
  
"Yeah, right," Marco snorted. "I think a little finesse is in order, Jake. We go in as dogs. Real cute dogs . . . "  
  
"You're ill, Marco," I said.  
  
"Well, at least I have better sense than to alert every Controller on Earth that there was somebody important to us at this pool party!"  
  
Okay, he had a point. I was supposed to admit that? Yeah, right.  
  
Jake, before we can do anything, we need to scope out the situation. We can't decide on a battle plan until we know exactly what kind of defenses we're looking at. And we won't be sure what they'll have up until Friday night itself.   
  
I noticed that Cassie had stopped mucking her stall. She and Ax were standing next to each other quietly. Cassie was obviously waiting for us to quiet down. Ax looked confused.  
  
Prince Jake?   
  
"Yeah, Ax?"  
  
Why not merely prevent Jordan from ever reaching the revelry in the first place?   
  
We all stared at him. Cassie hid a smile.  
  
"Leave it to Ax to take all the fun out of a mission," I faltered.  
  
"No style," Marco muttered. "None whatsoever."  
  
But plenty of brains, Tobias noted. Good call, Ax-man.   
  
I doubt you've ever seen a smug Andalite. Believe me, Ax was as smug as they come. 


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five:  
  
  
  
When you're an Animorph, there are days on which you just want to be normal. And there are days on which being normal means doing something just a little bit weird.  
  
By the end of the meeting, we had a pretty good plan for Friday night. Jordan was planning to take a bus to Megan's neighborhood, since she didn't exactly want Mom pulling up and seeing the . . . other guests. I guess she had this weird feeling like multiple piercings, snake tattoos, and kegs of beer would cause complications in the whole party-going approval process.  
  
So. I would exercise all my older-sister powers to keep Jordan at home. If that didn't work, Jake was going to morph Homer, his dog, and see if he could distract her. Hopefully, she would recognize him and try to return him to his house. Failing that, Marco was all set to sabotage the bus.  
  
I'm pretty sure Marco was just hoping our other two plans would fail. He had that gleam in his eye when sabotage was first mentioned.  
  
The meeting ended, and I morphed bald eagle. With the heat, there was no way I was going to slog home on foot.  
  
The thermals were amazing. With that much hot air blowing around, you pretty much get picked up and thrown by the sky. I flew home blindly, not really thinking about anything. I watched the ground below. House. Street. Kid riding bike. House. House. Big street. Parking lot. Bulldozer. Construction cones.  
  
I was almost past it before I realized where I was.  
  
The mall. The new water tower. Erected in place of the one Jake had blown up.  
  
The one where I had almost died.  
  
Where I had almost killed Marco.  
  
No, *I* hadn't almost killed him. The filthy slug in my head almost had.  
  
Yeah, well, how do you think that slug got in your head, Rachel? Because you weren't careful. Because you walked right into a Yeerk trap.  
  
Hey, Tobias said.  
  
I banked hard, letting a scream of surprise rip out of my beak. Tobias!   
  
What, you didn't see me? Rachel, I couldn't have been more obvious if I were a jumbo jet! Don't you people ever look around?   
  
Not when we're brooding, I muttered.  
  
Brooding, huh?   
  
Yeah, I said. He flew alongside me silently. I looked over at him. Aren't you going to offer me a penny for my thoughts or something?   
  
Sorry, I'm a hawk. I don't have any pocket change.   
  
I smiled. Well, smiled mentally, anyway. It's hard to really smile with a beak.  
  
Tobias has a way of drawing me out without asking a single question. I was thinking about the water tower, I confessed.  
  
He looked back at the shiny new structure. Yeah.   
  
It's . . . I groped for what I felt. It's gonna haunt me for the rest of my life. Every time I walk, drive, or fly past here, I'll think about . . . everything.   
  
Every time I fly past, I'll think about Ax in human morph, wearing that circus outfit, screaming, "BoBo! BoBo, obey me!" into a bullhorn.   
  
I laughed at that. We flew silently for a while.  
  
That's your house, Tobias said.  
  
Right. Gotta dive. I folded my wings and began my descent. Tobias dived with me.  
  
Hey, you're coming tomorrow, right?   
  
What, to Ax's scoop? Sure, I'll be there.   
  
Cool. See you then. He opened his wings and caught the sky.  
  
  
  
Jordan opened the door, and leaned against the frame, eyeing me laughingly. "Hey. Been dancing?"  
  
I kept a box of clothes hidden out back for the times my window was closed. When I had demorphed and moved the bushes aside, the box was missing. Consequentially, I was in my bare feet and leotard at my front door. Which was, of course, locked. So I had been forced to ring the doorbell and wait until Jordan opened up. I had gotten very strange looks from my elderly neighbor, waiting there. So I wasn't in the best of moods.  
  
"Hi, Jordan," I sighed, pushing past her, and into the house.  
  
She perched on the stairs in our front hall, a smug smile still splashing over her face. "That is quite the outfit, Rachel. You go to school in that?"  
  
I turned, my eyes narrowed. "Jordan, did you move my box?"  
  
"What box?" she asked, a little too innocently.  
  
"The box of clothes," I growled.  
  
"Oh, those were *your* clothes?" she warbled. "I thought they had been left by the Salvation Army!"  
  
I groaned. "Sara!" I yelled.  
  
"Yeah?" her thin voice squeaked back.  
  
"Did you see Jordan bring a box of clothes in?"  
  
"Yeah!"  
  
"Sara!" Jordan protested.  
  
"Where'd she put them?"  
  
"In her closet!"  
  
"*Sara*!" Jordan shouted, even louder. I shot her a look, and pounded up the stairs. Jordan followed behind me. "Sara, I'm gonna tell Mom on you!"  
  
My youngest sister poked her head out of her room. "But I didn't do anything!"  
  
"I mean next time you *do* do something, I'm gonna tell!"  
  
I wrenched open Jordan's door, and threw open her closet. Oh, and in case you're wondering? Jordan's walls were covered with the Backstreet Boys, a rapper named CrayZ, Legolas from the Lord of the Rings, a doctor from some hospital sitcom, and Marco.  
  
Yes, Marco.  
  
Now you know why I don't go into her room much.  
  
I grabbed my box from her closet, and headed for my room. Jordan was loudly protesting my intrusion all the way.  
  
I threw the box onto my bed, and glared down at Jordan.  
  
The little shrimp had no clue how much I loved her.  
  
The phone rang. Jordan stopped mid-whine and darted off to answer it. I shook my head, and headed into the bathroom.  
  
Tomorrow was St. Patrick's Day.  
  
I grabbed a green bottle out of the medicine cabinet, and studied the back label. Then I set to work. 


	6. Chapter Six

Chapter Six:  
  
  
  
"Abnormal, he says. Abnormal! The blue psycho centaur who hangs out with talking birds and kids who turn into animals, who fights alien slugs, and whose hooves start to drool at the mention of Cinnabon! He takes one look at my hair, and says, 'abnormal'?" I glared at Ax.  
  
"Found it," Cassie reported, emerging from Ax's scoop. She grinned mischievously. Her finger was marking a particular place in the book she was holding. "'Abb-NOR-mull. Adjective. Not typical, usual, or regular; not normal; deviant.' That's what it says."  
  
"Sorry, Rachel," Jake smirked. "The dictionary has spoken. Your hair is abnormal."  
  
"Forget the definition, let's get to the good stuff!" Marco snatched the book away from Cassie, and flipped to the back. "Thesaurus section, thesaurus section. Heeeeeeere we go," he announced, scanning the page. "Bizarre, eccentric, funny, gross, odd, screwy, strange, unnatural, unusual!" He laughed. "That pretty much sums it up."  
  
I groaned. "It's Saint Patrick's Day, for crying out loud! Can't I do anything around here without provoking ridicule?"  
  
"Nope," Marco said.  
  
I like it, Tobias said.  
  
Indeed, Ax agreed. While it's different, I don't find the artificial coloration of your hair unpleasant. It reminds me of the plumage of a certain sub-species of feathered serpent from the Hork-Bajir homeworld.   
  
"Great," I sighed, running my fingers through my hair. "I remind Ax of a snake."  
  
It was Wednesday. St. Patrick's day. School had let out a little early, mostly because the teacher's couldn't keep the kids in their seats. I had caused quite a stir all day by dying the bottom four inches of my hair a bright, vibrant green. And it looked great, just for the record.  
  
A very attractive snake, Ax amended.  
  
"Oh, well. Okay then."  
  
Thus far, it had been a pretty good day. We had a plan to stop Jordan from going to the party, I had been admired by the whole school all morning, and I had demonstrated that I wasn't scared. Things were flowing pretty smoothly. As long as life didn't throw in any monkey wrenches at this point, I figured I was in the clear for a little while.  
  
Plus, Tobias liked my hair, and that never hurt. No matter how many jocks, geeks, and herd members at school uttered clumsy compliments, none of them meant as much as Tobias's understated approval.  
  
Oh, yeah. It was a good day, all right.  
  
"That's right, Rachel," Marco said. "With that hair, you're comparable to a good-looking alien snake. Congratulations."  
  
"Thanks," I snorted.  
  
You know the color will be gone the first time you morph, Tobias said.  
  
"Yeah," I nodded. "That's why I used permanent dye and got this great color."  
  
Cassie looked startled. "Does your mom know you used that permanent dye?"  
  
My mom has this little thing about permanent hair dye. Little, as in she'd flip out big time if I actually died my hair with anything that didn't wash out in the next shower. And, in general, I have to agree with her. Unless you're really sure it's going to work, dying your hair is just generally not a good idea. Especially not for natural blondes.  
  
"It's not really permanent," I smiled. "I mean, yeah, it's permanent dye, but it's totally gone as soon as I want it to be. Like Tobias said, I just have to morph out."  
  
Is there some problem with permanent dye?   
  
"Permanent means that she looks that way forever, Ax. Trapped, with her hair looking . . . " Marco paused, consulting Ax's thesaurus again, " . . . weird, weirdo, offbeat, and mutant."  
  
"Marco," I said menacingly, "give me that book. Give it!" I leapt at him, attempting to wrestle the dictionary from his hands.  
  
The others watched us, smiling. I tugged on Marco's short hair.  
  
"Hand it over!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Now!"  
  
Instead of complying, Marco staggered back and craned his neck up and to the left. "What was that?" he gasped dramatically.  
  
"Oh, no, you don't," I snorted. "I'm not falling for that. Give me the thesaurus!"  
  
"No, seriously!" he protested, relinquishing the volume and standing. "Look!" He pointed. We looked.  
  
In the air above us was a spaceship. A very small space ship. Maybe one foot long. It was hovering. And there was a certain something about it, which was hard to put my finger on. A certain . . .  
  
That ship has an attitude, Tobias commented.  
  
That was the word.  
  
"Is anyone else getting a sinking feeling in the pit of their stomach?" Marco asked. "Maybe associated with the word 'Helmacron'?"  
  
About these Helmacrons. The little creeps are, maybe, a sixteenth of an inch high, but they've got egos the size of Utah.  
  
No, bigger than that. They're more full of themselves than Marco.  
  
The Helmacrons are pretty much convinced that they run the universe. Which is fine, I guess, as long as they don't actually try to do anything with it. The last time we met them, they proved very, very irritating.  
  
Irritating as in, we all came pretty close to death while trying to deal with them. That's irritating. Anybody who places me in a life-or-death situation just pretty much gets on my nerves.  
  
I dunno. Maybe I'm touchy.  
  
As puny as these Helmacrons are, they have some seriously advanced technology. Their big surprise for an unsuspecting enemy is this shrinking ray. Seems the Helmacrons like an even playing field. They push a button and, bam, a cockroach is the size of the Chrysler building. Not cool.  
  
I looked up at the little ship as it thrummed above us. There was a chance it might be some *other* small, aggressive, death's-head-bridged ship, piloted by another species of tiny aliens.  
  
Horrifically bloated alien beings! a thoughtspeech voice proclaimed. Cower and grovel before your conquerors, your lords and masters! We have returned, and you shall know the full might of our wrath soon enough! Beg for your lives while you still have them, and we will only humiliate you for a short while before we kill you!   
  
Or not.  
  
"Oh, yeah," Jake said, glaring at the miniature ship. "I've got that sinking feeling, Marco." 


	7. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven:  
  
  
  
The Helmacron craft hovered and thrummed just inches away from my face. I got a really great view of the tiny laser cannons, and a big cannon thing, which, I guessed, housed the shrinking ray.  
  
Well, big by Helmacron standards.  
  
I wanted a baseball bat at that moment. I so wanted a baseball bat.  
  
"What do you want, Helmacrons?" Jake asked. He was careful not to aggravate the little creeps. Like I said, the Helmacrons can shrink other people down to their level, and Jake was about as interested in being shrunk as I was in dating Marco.  
  
The thoughtspeech of the Helmacrons was shrill, drilling through my head like the bite of a mosquito.  
  
We do not want! We have all! We possess all! We are the lords of the galaxy, nay, of the universe! And those who do not feel our scepter and whip soon shall. Yet, we have not come to ensure your wretchedness today.   
  
"Can't tell you how relieved I am," Marco muttered.  
  
Instead, we have come to perform a ceremony of our people! Stand back, O blimpish slaves! Clear the traditional place of landing!   
  
"What traditional place of landing?" I demanded.  
  
The small spaceship's little "vrrrreeeeeeeeeem" noise grew louder, and it blew past my face at mach two, practically ripping my nose off. It glided over to the flat rock Cassie was sitting on. Remove your horrific hindquarters from our sacred mountain! the thoughtspeak voice screamed, apparently outraged.  
  
"I didn't know it was your sacred mountain," Cassie protested, standing. Then, as an afterthought, "And my hindquarters are not horrific."  
  
"Jake agrees with you," Marco smirked, patting her on the shoulder. I kicked him in the shin, and he was mostly silent for a couple minutes.  
  
Thrumming, practically purring, the ship nestled down onto its "sacred mountain."  
  
We now recite the ancient words laid down by our foremothers for this most sober of ceremonies, the voice intoned.  
  
Small audio projectors swiveled into place on the fore and aft of the ship. Hundreds of Helmacron voices rang out into the morning air.  
  
"NEEP. NEEP. NEEP. NEEP. NEEP."  
  
Wow. That was moving. Tobias said.  
  
In great disgrace, with loathing and abhorrence, we disinherit from our species this abominable heretic, this disgusting preacher of false doctrine, this most hated one who has led even the young astray with her lethal foolishness.   
  
"Hemlock," Jake muttered. "Where's the hemlock?"  
  
I smiled.  
  
"Shhh!" Cassie urged.  
  
We therefore, in a tradition carried on for over three thousand years, cast aside this evil truth-twister, and leave her in the greatest dishonor, and with the most shameful shame of all! Banishment to one of the primitive, giant worlds!   
  
"Wait," Marco said. "It's a punishment to be left on Earth?"  
  
They've been coming to this rock for three thousand years? Tobias asked.  
  
"Maybe Helmacron years are shorter than real years," I suggested. "Like dog years or something."  
  
"I'm thinking two weeks," Marco said snidely.  
  
If so, Ax pointed out, they were already visiting alien planets forty Earth years after your American Civil War.   
  
"Ouch," I winced.  
  
A tiny portal opened in the side of the ship. I leaned in and squinted down what was taking place. Seven Helmacrons emerged, one of them being carried by the other six. They strode purposefully out onto the rock, and dropped the seventh unceremoniously onto the hard surface.  
  
We, they said in unison, your closest friends and former companions, cast you aside like an old fleeber!   
  
"What's a fleeber?"  
  
We spit upon you! There was a pause, ostensibly for the Helmacrons to spit. We kick you! They did so. We would slay you with our rapiers but you deserve worse! And so we leave you! As one body, they turned and trooped back up into the ship. There was a little scuffle at the top of the ramp, to be the first one in. Then the hatch slid smoothly shut, with a click.  
  
"I dunno. I think being left alone by Helmacrons is a good thing," Marco commented.  
  
"Shh!" Cassie insisted.  
  
The ship began to lift off. May you live for a century in potent discouragement and abysmal safety, the Helmacron voice pronounced. With our insults still ringing in your ears, we leave you! Scum!   
  
Many other Helmacron voices chimed in at this point.  
  
Filth!   
  
Male!   
  
Rubbage!   
  
Fool!   
  
Coward!   
  
Male!   
  
Weakling!   
  
I already said male.   
  
You did not.   
  
Yeerk!   
  
Slave!   
  
Male!   
  
I already SAID male!   
  
I said it first!   
  
Scientist!   
  
Look, do you want to be run through?   
  
Idiot!   
  
Traitor!   
  
Giant!   
  
This, apparently, was the worst in the arsenal of insults, as the other Helmacrons gasped appreciatively. Then, with a sudden change in speed, the craft blasted out of sight.  
  
There was a moment of silence. A bird sang some distance off.  
  
Marco broke the bewildered silence. "Well. This is different." 


	8. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight:  
  
  
  
We all stared at the tiny, unmoving body on the stone.  
  
What do we do now? Tobias asked.  
  
We go to Cinnabon, Ax suggested.  
  
Typical of Ax.  
  
"Ax, now isn't the time," Cassie said, a note of reprimand in her voice.  
  
I'm serious. This is a Helmacron affair. None of our concern. We should let the being fend for itself.   
  
I was surprised. I had known that Ax was pretty ruthless, but it was obvious that the Helmacron wouldn't survive for two minutes out there by herself. By suggesting we leave her, Ax was basically pronouncing the death sentence.  
  
"Yeah," Marco agreed. "Like in Star Trek. The Prime Directive. Don't interfere in other aliens' business."  
  
Big surprise there. Of course Marco would draw his life lessons from Star Trek.  
  
"This isn't Star Trek, Marco," Cassie countered. "The Prime Directive doesn't apply here. The fact of the matter is, aliens do interfere with other species. All the time. It's just the way the galaxy works."  
  
"This is reality, Greg," chuckled Jake.  
  
"Huh?" We all regarded him in confusion.  
  
"Oh, come on, guys! Are you telling me that none of you have seen 'E.T.'?"  
  
Ah, yes, Ax said. The film representing the Queen of the Ginneggg race as an alien visitor on Earth.   
  
The what? Tobias asked.  
  
"Hello! People!" blustered Cassie. "This is not trivia time! This is figure-out-what-to-do-with-marooned-Helmacron time!"  
  
"Is she even alive?" I asked. The little alien hadn't moved much that I could see since being dropped off on the so-called "Sacred Mountain."  
  
Yeah, she's breathing, Tobias reported.  
  
Jake gave him an odd look. "You can see her breathing?"  
  
Can I see her breathing? Can I *see* her? Jake, you're talking to the flying, mouse-eating, Yeerk-tail-kicking telescope, here, Tobias retorted, sounding somewhat ruffled.  
  
"Yeah, sorry."  
  
"I would take her home, Jake," Cassie said, "but we're repainting my bedroom, so I'm sleeping in the den. I can't hide her."  
  
The issue at hand isn't what to do with the alien, Ax interrupted, but whether to do anything with the alien or not. I, for one, am in favor of letting other beings simply go about their business. Ax's sounded stuffy and self-righteous. Like normal, only more so.  
  
"What, like Seerow did?" Jake asked.  
  
Ax stiffened. Cassie glared reproachfully at Jake.  
  
Long story behind that one. Suffice it to say, Seerow was an Andalite who made a mistake. A big one. And Jake probably shouldn't have mentioned him at all.  
  
Andalites, as a species, learn from their mistakes, Ax said, in icy, measured tones. It's exactly because of Seerow that I suggest non- interference.   
  
From the look on Jake's face, and the way Tobias was moving on his branch, I guessed Tobias was chewing him out in private. Tobias is Ax's best friend. Generally, it doesn't really show, since we're all good friends. Saving each other's lives about a million times will tend to cement a friendship. But Jake had crossed the line, and Tobias was letting him know it.  
  
Jake massaged his temples slowly. "Okay, look. I'm sorry, Ax. I shouldn't have said that."  
  
I understand, Prince Jake. Ax still sounded hurt, but like he was recovering.  
  
"Good. Now, let's think about this," Jake continued. "Do we really want the responsibility of caring for a Helmacron outcast?"  
  
There was a conflicting chorus of "Yes" and "No" from the others. I kept quiet.  
  
"Okay," he sighed, "let's try this individually. Cassie?"  
  
"It would be wrong to just leave her here."  
  
"Gee, Cassie, I never would have guessed you'd feel that way." Marco. Of course.  
  
"Marco, what's your vote?"  
  
"No way. I'm with Ax on this one. Ain't no way we can start a little lost alien shelter. We're slightly busy people."  
  
"Rachel?"  
  
"Abstain," I said, shrugging. "I have no clue." I mean, come on. I'm supposed to help decide whether it's right or wrong to adopt an excommunicated Helmacron? Forget it. I was still trying to deal with the war and my sister.  
  
"What? Mighty Xena doesn't know how to deal with marooned Helmacrons?"  
  
I shook my head. "No, Marco. I'm too busy trying to figure out what to do with you."  
  
"Aw, I'm touched you care."  
  
Jake ignored our banter, as usual. "Tobias?"  
  
All I can say is, if you do decide to help her, she'd better not start frightening the mice in my field.   
  
"Is that a yes or a no?"  
  
It's an . . . abstain, he said. I smiled.  
  
"We all know Ax's position," Jake said. "And I'd have to vote that we should help her. I mean, it's only until her sentence ends. Severe Helmacron sentences probably last fifteen minutes. So, two votes yes, two votes no, two abstains. Tobias, Rachel? Either of you want to vote for real?"  
  
I shook my head. Tobias ruffled his feathers. The message was the same.  
  
"No. Okay. That leaves us with a dead tie."  
  
We cannot go involving us in the affairs of aliens! Ax exploded.  
  
"Said the alien who we rescued from the sea, after a space battle for Earth by two alien species," Marco muttered.  
  
I demand that you interfere in my affairs!   
  
We all turned to regard the Helmacron. She was standing on her four tiny legs. I couldn't be sure, at that size, but I have a feeling she was glaring up at us. This planet of yours is hostile! You cannot merely leave me here to perish! The entire Helmacron Empire would come crashing down on your heads for such a travesty!   
  
But you were just kicked out of the Helmacron Empire, Tobias observed.  
  
Oh. Yes. She fell silent at that, considering it. Nonetheless! This is your planet, and the well-being of the creatures on it is your concern! You are to interfere with me immediately!   
  
"Well," I said, squinting at the Helmacron. "I guess that breaks the tie, doesn't it?"  
  
I knew Ax would be grumbling for weeks over counting the Helmacron's 'request' as an official vote. 


	9. Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine:  
  
  
  
Jake said several official words of welcome. Of course, he invented them for the occasion. Marco was cracking up the whole time. Jake tried so hard to be serious, but he knew as well as I did how really ridiculous it sounded.  
  
"Applause, applause, cut the red ribbon," Marco said, when Jake had concluded his brief speech. "How long did we just commit to babysitting this thing for?"  
  
An excellent question, Ax said.  
  
Jake and Cassie exchanged an uncertain glance. "Until . . . she can fend for herself?" Cassie suggested hesitantly.  
  
"Are you insane?" Marco exclaimed. "Look at her! She's an ant-snack, for crying out loud! Baby mice are like Godzilla to her!"  
  
"Well . . . "  
  
Okay, we might have thought this out a little more carefully before agreeing, Tobias murmured.  
  
"We'll just watch her until the next Helmacrons come through," Jake said.  
  
"Oh, yeah, sure. There's a bus every two weeks," Marco snorted. "Hey! Helmacron! How long does this 'banishment' last?"  
  
The inglorious sentence is lifelong, the Helmacron replied.  
  
"And when the emcee of that little ceremony said 'may you live for a century,' that was figurative, right?"  
  
Of course! the Helmacron snorted.  
  
"Well, that's a relief."  
  
Without other Helmacrons or real enemies to engage in combat, one's life is not cut so honorably short. On such a mundane planet as this, fifty years is probably the briefest lifespan I can hope for.   
  
We stared. Jake staggered a little as he realized what he had just committed to.  
  
"I am so not going to spend the next fifty years making sure she doesn't get beaten up by butterflies," I muttered.  
  
"Fifty years?" Jake choked.  
  
Indeed.   
  
"Okay," he said. "Okay. No problem."  
  
"No problem?" Marco said. "How is there no problem? Seems to me like we've got a big, Apollo 13-sized problem here, Houston!"  
  
"I meant no problem in that, 'We are in deep, deep sludge,' sort of way," Jake said. Then he snapped into Mister-President mode. "Okay, here's the plan. Ax, you keep her here at your scoop. Tomorrow, after school, we all gather back and . . . do something."  
  
"Listen to that man lead," Marco said.  
  
Prince Jake, I must protest. I do not feel it would be morally right for me to guard the Helmacron. In fact, I object to this whole procedure.   
  
Jake glanced at Cassie, looking for some kind of signal. See, Cassie's sort of Jake's moral barometer. Jake relies pretty heavily on her for advice on how to deal with all of us. I followed his eyes over to her. He was expecting her to tell him whether he should lean towards being firm with Ax, or giving him a break.  
  
But instead of nodding, smiling, frowning, or remaining impassive - any of which would have given Jake a hint - she merely knit her brows in a subtle, helpless shrug. Jake looked away, disappointed.  
  
The whole exchange took maybe two seconds, but it frightened me more than some battles I had been in. Things weren't healthy, if Cassie wasn't cluing Jake in.  
  
"Ax," he said after a moment more of hesitation, "I need you to . . . " he paused, as if he had been interrupted. The forest was silent of voices as he seemed to listen to something.  
  
Private thoughtspeech, of course. I just didn't know if it was coming from the Helmacron, from Ax, or from Tobias.  
  
" . . . I need you to try and remember everything you can about Helmacrons. Any information whatsoever will be helpful."  
  
Yes, Prince Jake.   
  
It was not what he was originally going to say. We all knew it.  
  
Something was definitely weird.  
  
I mean, beyond the fact that alien slugs were invading the planet and we turned into animals in order to stop them.  
  
Something was up with Jake.  
  
"Rachel, you take the Helmacron home tonight," he decided.  
  
I opened my mouth to object. Then I stopped, and thought twice. Ax had already managed to deflect a direct order from Jake. If I refused, things could get real ugly.  
  
Plus, how weak would it look if I wimped out now?  
  
"Sure, Jake," I said. "But do we have a plan for what happens if my sisters see her?"  
  
"Don't let them," he said.  
  
Oh, real helpful.  
  
The meeting broke up quickly after that. Tobias had to go hunting, Cassie had chores. I knew Jake wanted time to plan out his next move. I found myself alone with the Helmacron. Honestly, I think that the others just wanted to get out of there as fast as they could. The situation was a little freaky.  
  
I squinted down at the little alien. I still remembered vividly what Helmacrons looked like up close and personal. I really, really preferred to see them from my own natural size.  
  
For a Helmacron, she had been silent throughout the meeting. I began to wonder if she was dead or something.  
  
"Hey," I said.  
  
Yes, bloated alien?   
  
Well, not dead. Not yet.  
  
"Um, I'm taking you back to my place," I said. "But I'm sort of wondering how I'm going to carry you there."  
  
You expect me to solve this problem? Use your swollen bulk of gray matter!   
  
I stooped down until I was sort of on eye level with her. Except, of course, my eyes were bigger than she was. "Listen up," I said. "If you want to survive long on Earth, you're going to have to learn a few manners."  
  
I mock manners! Manners are for weaklings and aliens! I spit on all manners!   
  
"Case in point," I said. I really didn't want to morph. I didn't feel like losing the green in my hair yet. Finally, I just stuck out my hand. "Climb on up. We're gonna do this the 'Indian in the Cupboard' way." 


	10. Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten:  
  
  
  
"Now, listen up. That's my house. I'm going to take you in. But you have to absolutely promise me not to say a single word any time we're inside."  
  
Why?   
  
I looked down at the Helmacron in my hand. "I don't want my sisters or my mom finding out about you."  
  
Because they would be terrified by my Helmacron might, and it would pain you to see them grovel before me?   
  
"Yeah," I laughed. "Sure, that's it."  
  
Since you have proven obedient thus far, in sheltering me from your brutish elements, I shall grant your petition.   
  
"Thanks," I said. Then I realized I had a little bit of a problem. I couldn't go in while holding the Helmacron in my hand. Even if I made a loose fist, Jordan or Sara might notice and ask what I was holding. I couldn't put the little creep in my pocket. I'd crush it as I walked. I stood silently before my house, stumped.  
  
I guess I must have stood there for a while, because the Helmacron interrupted my thoughts. Are you performing some primitive, religious ritual before entering? she asked.  
  
"What? No. I just don't know how I'm going to get you in. You have to be concealed, but safe."  
  
Place me on the interior rim of your titanic ear, simpleton. I shall be both protected and invisible from that vantage point.   
  
"Oh. Yeah. That makes sense." Dumb of me not to think of that. I lifted my hand, and felt a little tickle as the Helmacron climbed up onto my ear.  
  
I am secure. You may proceed, brutish creature.   
  
"Just what I need," I muttered. "Another small, arrogant alien inside my ear, telling me what to do."  
  
I let myself into the house, trying hard to keep my head still. Jordan was on the couch with Sara, watching some anime show. Pokemon or Digimon or Reggaemon or whatever "mon" it was this month. Sara scooted higher on the couch and tilted her head back to see who had come in. "Hi, Rachel!" she yelled.  
  
"Hi," I said.  
  
Maybe you've been wondering whatever happened with Jordan. You might even think that I'd forgotten about her.  
  
Not a chance.  
  
Today was Wednesday. The party was Friday. I had three long days to wait before my sister would be - temporarily - safe from infestation or loss of innocence. And I'm not exactly a waiting kind of person, so I wasn't having any fun, either.  
  
Jordan slid off the couch. "Hey, Rachel! I need to talk to you."  
  
"Not now, Jordan." I headed upstairs to my room.  
  
"Rachel, this is serious!"  
  
I turned to look at her. Great. Just perfect. I had done nothing but try to talk to her for the past few days. Now she wanted to have a heart-to- heart. Now that I had a Helmacron sitting inside my ear.  
  
I was beginning to believe in Marco's irony gods.  
  
I played nervously with a strand of hair by my ear. "Okay," I said. "What?"  
  
"What did you tell Mom about Megan?"  
  
"Nothing," I said. "What are you talking about?"  
  
She set her jaw angrily. It's a habit she picked up from me. "Rachel, I *told* you not to talk to Mom about Megan!"  
  
"Look, I didn't say anything about her. What happened?"  
  
"Mom said I can't go to the party. Because *some*body badmouthed Megan to her, so now she's all, 'I don't want you hanging out with that kind of person' and she said I can't go!"  
  
Mom wouldn't let her go? Sweet.  
  
I probably would have been much happier about this news if I didn't have a tiny alien perched just above and behind my earlobe. As it was, I merely pulled my mouth into an exaggerated frown. "Awwwwww," I oozed sarcastically. "Really? Gee, that's too bad."  
  
Jordan glared at me. "I told you that I'd tell Mom you've been cheating on your homework."  
  
"No," I disputed. I was a whole lot less worried about being grounded than about having to spend extra time doing homework. The Chee could get grounded for me. "You said that you'd tell her about the last ten times I snuck out."  
  
"Twelve," she said.  
  
I felt the tickle of the Helmacron moving in my ear. "Whatever." I turned, and headed upstairs.  
  
"I'm gonna get you in big trouble!" she yelled after me.  
  
Big trouble. Well, sure. I mean, it's not like I was in big trouble already, or anything. Having a tiny, excommunicated Helmacron sitting inside of my ear wasn't being in big trouble. Being one of the six kids that were wanted dead or alive by a whole invading alien empire wasn't being in big trouble. Jordan might get me grounded if I didn't watch myself! Boy, I'd better be careful.  
  
Do you see why I'm not that easily intimidated these days? I mean, Teletubbies doesn't scare me. How callous is that?  
  
"Yeah, okay!" I shouted. I closed and locked my door. "Get out of my ear. Now."  
  
The Helmacron dutifully trotted onto my hand. That was the first . . .   
  
"SHHHH!" I exploded, desperately holding a finger up to my mouth. I had just *told* the little freak not to use thoughtspeech! If she wasn't careful, Jordan and Sara would hear her. And then really, really bad things would happen.  
  
If you'll excuse the pun, all Hell-macron would break loose.  
  
This is private thoughtspeech, O foolish one, she informed me.  
  
"Oh."  
  
As I was saying, that was the first healthy female-female relationship I've yet to see here on Earth.   
  
"You liked that, huh?" I set her down on my dresser.  
  
Indeed. The struggle for dominance was most rewarding. At the sacred mountain, you capitulated to your female leader so easily that I thought you were a male.   
  
"Well, I'm not a male. Wait a minute. My female . . . " I puzzled over this. "I don't have a female leader."  
  
Of course you do. She told you to bring me to this domicile.   
  
What was she talking about? There hadn't been a female. Jake had told me to . . .  
  
"Jake's not female," I said. "He's a male."  
  
No. She contradicted me sharply. This Jake is a female. She is your leader, therefore she is female.   
  
I smiled. "I can't wait to see his face when I tell him that." 


	11. Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven:  
  
  
  
"No," I said. "Try to get this straight. I'm Rachel. I'm a female. So is Cassie. Female, I mean. Jake, Marco, Tobias, and Ax are all males."  
  
I was lying on my bed, chin resting on my hands, trying to talk to the Helmacron. It wasn't easy.  
  
And this Cassie is your captain? she asked.  
  
"No. Jake is the leader."  
  
But you just said he was male!   
  
"He is."  
  
Then he cannot be your captain. Captains are female. Also, this Jake is alive.   
  
"Oh, yeah. I forgot your weird, Helmacrons-kill-their-leaders thing."  
  
No wonder you have not yet succeeded in driving the Yeerks off your planet. Jake, your captain, is still alive. You should kill her, and then she would be an effective leader.   
  
"Him. 'We should kill him,'" I repeated, emphasizing the 'him.' Man, would this thing never learn?  
  
Then you agree with me?   
  
"Huh?"  
  
You will kill Jake?   
  
"*What*?" What was she talking about?  
  
You just said, "We should kill him."   
  
I rolled my eyes. "I was correcting your grammar!"  
  
Then you won't kill her?   
  
"Him. And no." My head was beginning to ache. I wanted out of that conversation. "Listen, we'll sort all this out later. I need something to eat. Are you hungry?"  
  
Yes. Although it has been only four days since my last meal, I find myself curiously ravenous. Perhaps it is because of your cloyingly large Earth atmosphere.   
  
I was getting used to the Helmacron scattering insults through the conversation. "Four days?" I repeated. "How often do you people need to eat?"  
  
Brave Helmacron females only require food once every week, in general. That does not appear to be the case here, although I am unsure why.   
  
I squinted at her. I couldn't be sure, of course, as she was so small, but I got the impression that she was a little larger than your average Helmacron. Larger around the middle, I mean. My guess is that her desire for food didn't have all that much to do with the large Earth atmosphere.  
  
"I'll grab something from the kitchen," I said, levering myself off the bed. "Back in a second. Stay there." Like she could go anywhere . . .  
  
I thought you were female! the Helmacron protested.  
  
I paused by the door. "I am. What are you talking about now?"  
  
Females do not prepare their own food. That is a task for the males.   
  
"Not on Earth." That creature had one serious gender-obsession. I left the room, shaking my head. I hoped Jake was coming up with one great plan for getting rid of our guest, because I was losing patience really, really fast.  
  
Jordan poked her head out of her room. She looked angry, but over that was a layer of curiosity. "Who was on the phone?" she asked.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You were in your room, talking on the phone to someone. Who was it?"  
  
Oh, right. The Helmacron had been using private thoughtspeak, so all Jordan had heard was me talking. It would have sounded like I was on the phone. "Um, Cassie," I said.  
  
I could remember, vaguely, a time when I felt bad about lying to my family. Now it was second-nature.  
  
"Uh-huh." She frowned at me. "I'm still mad."  
  
"Look," I said, "I didn't tell Mom about Megan. She heard it from somebody else."  
  
"Yeah, sure," she snorted. "The Tooth Fairy told her."  
  
"Whoever," I said, and headed downstairs.  
  
Actually, now that she mentioned it, I started to wonder. Who *had* told Mom about Megan? Had she just been talking with a teacher, or something?  
  
Well, it was probably useless to wonder about those things. Not only was Mom a mom, but she was a lawyer. People like her just find out about things.  
  
Sara was at the kitchen table, drawing a typical little-girl picture. You know, a very square house, with a yellow sun, lots of flowers, and a tree with a bird in it. It was really cute, actually.  
  
"Hi, Rachel," she chirped as I walked in.  
  
"Hey kiddo. Drawing?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Cool." I opened the fridge, looking for something fast and easy. I couldn't afford to leave the Helmacron alone for too long. Too bad we'd finished up the last of that pizza. I pulled a Tupperware labeled, "Chicken Soup" out of the back of the fridge, and shook it dubiously. It rattled. "That's just not right," I muttered, shoving it behind the milk. "Sara, remind me to clean out this fridge sometime."  
  
"'Kay," she agreed.  
  
I finally gave up on finding anything worthwhile and grabbed a couple PopTarts out of the cupboard. While they were heating up, I watched Sara draw. Her head was cocked to one side, and the tip of her tongue stuck out in concentration. Her whole world was centered on that one little picture. I saw her add a scrawled stick figure in a pink dress like the one she was wearing.  
  
"Is that you?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah." She put a large, down-turned line on the face of the stick figure.  
  
"Are you frowning?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"'Cause you and Jordan are fighting."  
  
Ouch.  
  
I leaned on the kitchen table, and looked into her big, innocent eyes. What was I supposed to tell her? Sorry for being angry? Anger gets me through night after night of screaming terror. Sorry for not wanting Jordan to go the party? I was trying to keep Jordan alive. "Sara, I - "  
  
The toaster crunched as my PopTarts finished warming.  
  
Leaving the sentence unfinished, I grabbed the food and headed up to my room. I didn't even know what I would have said. Probably something that would only upset her further, no matter how hard I tried to comfort her. I couldn't talk to Sara anymore. Not really. I'm pretty sure she saw, better than most people, the change in me. I knew it was partially my fault that Sara cried more often now. Maybe all my fault.  
  
I pounded up the stairs, that feeling of frustrated helplessness beginning to boil in my blood again. I couldn't keep my baby sister from being sad. And I couldn't stop myself from getting angry because of that.  
  
At the end of the hall, my door was ajar. I could hear somebody moving around in there. And whoever they were, they were a whole lot bigger than a Helmacron.  
  
My heart throbbed in my throat as I pushed open the door.  
  
Jordan was on her hands and knees, peering under the bed. She looked up at me, an amazed expression on her face. "Rachel," she said, "you have to come see this weird bug. It looks just like an alien!" 


	12. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve:  
  
  
  
"*Jordan*!" I shouted. "What are you doing in my room?"  
  
"Kill me later," she said. "Right now, come look at this thing."  
  
I gritted my teeth and bent down. Pretended that I didn't know exactly what was under my bed. That my heart wasn't pounding out of my chest. "Look at what?"  
  
"That," she said, jabbing her finger at the Helmacron. The alien had scuttled back into the shadows, but you could still see her moving around.  
  
"What?" I asked. "That ant?"  
  
"It's not an ant. I saw it when it wasn't so close to the wall. I mean, I couldn't see it all that well. But I think it reared up on its four back legs, and it's shiny, like, this weird silver color."  
  
"So it's a deformed, silver ant," I said. "Get out of my room."  
  
"Rachel," she protested, "You gotta help me catch it. It's wild!"  
  
"Since when are you so interested in bugs?"  
  
She turned her head to look up at me. "Since they looked like they walked off the bridge of the 'Enterprise.'"  
  
"Look, Jordan," I sighed, "It's a bug. Would you get out of my room?"  
  
She sat up on her heels. "Well, excuse me for being interested," she sniffed.  
  
"You're excused."  
  
She slammed my door as hard as she could on her way out.  
  
I got on my stomach and looked down at the Helmacron. "You okay?" I whispered. Actually, I half-hoped she wasn't. It would save us a whole bunch of trouble if she just died of fright.  
  
As if that massive being could cause me discomfort, unless I burst myself laughing at her hideous figure, she snorted derisively. I am a Helmacron female!   
  
"No kidding," I said.  
  
Guess the whole dying of fright thing was out of the question.  
  
I stood. Brushed carpet lint off my shirt. Grabbed the phone off my bedside table. I dialed Jake's number quickly.  
  
A woman's voice answered the phone. "Hello?"  
  
"Hi, Aunt Jean?"  
  
"Hi, Jordan, how are you?"  
  
"This is Rachel," I said. Jake's mom could never tell our voices apart over the phone.  
  
"Oops, sorry," she laughed. "How are you?"  
  
Me? Exhausted, paranoid, guilty, angry, frustrated, and fighting a hopeless, endless war against evil alien slugs.  
  
"Fine, thanks. Listen, is Jake around?"  
  
"I think so. Hang on." There was a harsh scraping as she covered the phone with her hand. "Jake!" she yelled. There was a pause. "Tom, go get Jake, would you? Your cousin Rachel's on the phone!"  
  
Tom yelled something back.  
  
"Well, would you take the phone to him?"  
  
There was a brief scuffle, then I heard Tom's voice. "Hey, cousin," he said.  
  
"Hi," I grated tersely. I wouldn't call him Tom unless I had to. Because the thing that had just called me "cousin" wasn't Tom at all. It was the Yeerk that hid behind his eyes.  
  
"Just running the phone up to Jake," he puffed as he climbed the stairs.  
  
I waited, grinding my jaw. If only I could have reached through the phone and ripped that Yeerk right out of his ear.  
  
"Here you go," the Yeerk said.  
  
Then, "Hello?"  
  
"Jake? This is Rachel."  
  
"Hey," he said. "What's up?"  
  
I lowered my voice, in case Jordan might still be lurking around. "I want her out, Jake. I want her out of my house, pronto. I don't care what Ax says, I - "  
  
"That sounds great!" Jake said, interrupting me. We always have to be careful, when on the phone, in case others are listening in. Jake couldn't tell me to just calm down. It might attract Tom's attention. By interrupting me like that, he was telling me to cool off.  
  
I tried. Staying calm is not my greatest strength. Or my second greatest. Actually, it's kind of down there on the list. Way down.  
  
I listened to Jake carrying on a one-sided conversation across the line. He had done this before with all of us, at one time or another. As we took deep breaths and counted to fifty, he made little noises into the phone. "Mmm. Yup. Right, I . . . uh-huh."  
  
"Okay," I said, a little more collected. "Here's the deal. Jordan saw the . . . our guest."  
  
There was a beat of silence as he processed this. "When?" he asked.  
  
"Just now."  
  
"And?"  
  
"And I told her she was a bug."  
  
"And?"  
  
"And she bought it."  
  
"So, what's the problem?"  
  
"The problem," I hissed, "is that I can't deal with this right now. I've got too much on my plate as it is. You know I only agreed because I didn't want it to look like a mutiny out at the scoop."  
  
He thought about that for a minute. "Okay," he said, finally. "I've got to talk to Phillip." Phillip was the name we used for Ax when other people were around. "Can you keep her there tonight?"  
  
"Just get her out of here as soon as you can, Jake."  
  
"Yeah," he said. "Okay. I'll get back with you." He hung up.  
  
I drew a long breath, then turned and looked down at the Helmacron. She was standing out in the open now, looking up at me.  
  
You had best be inordinately pleased that I did not slay your sibling when she was examining me, she said. I was greatly tempted.   
  
"Yeah," I laughed. "I'm pleased." 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen:  
That night, around eleven o'clock, Ax and Jake came to pick up the Helmacron. I was more than happy to get her out of my dyed hair.  
  
School flew by, the next day. Probably because, for the moment, I wasn't really stressed out about anything. Which was unusual. I mean, Ax was taking care of the Helmacron. Jordan was banned from the party. I wasn't a Controller. Life was good, relatively speaking. For me, anyway. I live one of those lives where the absence of evil is the presence of good.  
  
Wow, how mystic was that?  
  
We all got off of the school bus near Cassie's house. Since we didn't want it to look like a stampede or slumber party, Jake got off a little before her stop, and Marco got off a little after. Everybody knows Cassie and I are best friends, so I got to get off with her. Cassie watched the school bus rattle around the bend. Her expression was a little bit wistful.  
  
"They're so lucky," she said.  
  
"Jake and Marco?" I asked.  
  
"No! The normal kids."  
  
"Oh. Them." Cassie was about to get philosophical on me.  
  
"Clueless and happy. Did you hear them? Their biggest worry is, 'Like, what if my new acne treatment doesn't work?' They're so . . . I don't know . . . "  
  
I played with a green-ended strand of my hair. "Innocent," I supplied.  
  
"Yeah, I guess."  
  
"Except for the Controllers."  
  
She heaved a sigh, and shrugged her backpack higher onto her shoulder. "So, what's this Helmacron like?"  
  
"Like?" I repeated blankly, as we began walking up the long road to her house.  
  
"You know, her personality."  
  
"Cassie, she's a Helmacron. How do you *think* her personality is?"  
  
"Well, you can't judge a whole species. I thought, since she this 'heretic,' she might be different."  
  
I shook my head. "Sorry. She's the same as the rest of them. Overbearing, arrogant, loud. Thinks she's boss of the universe."  
  
"Well, what's her big heresy?" Cassie probed. "Why'd she get kicked out of the empire?"  
  
I shrugged. "I don't know."  
  
"Okay . . . how about her name?"  
  
"Um. Are we sure Helmacrons have names?" I hedged. I hadn't even thought about the little freak having a name.  
  
"Rachel." Cassie turned on me with a disapproving frown. "You had nothing to do but talk to her yesterday afternoon and you didn't even find out her name?"  
  
"I didn't have 'nothing to do'!" I protested. "It was all I *could* do just to keep her from being discovered. And as it was, Jordan saw her anyway!"  
  
"She *did*?" Cassie gaped at me as if I had just morphed another human. "What happened?"  
  
I quickly filled her in on what had happened the previous day.  
  
She breathed a sigh of relief that Jordan had not actually found out anything, but still shook her head nervously. "That came too close."  
  
"It was way, way too close." I mean, come on. My little sister had actually seen an alien. How can that be anything but too close?  
  
We rounded the last bend on her long driveway. She stopped, and looked up at her house. "Rachel, has Jake talked to you about his plan for the Helmacron?"  
  
"No, I didn't even know he had one. What is it?"  
  
I hadn't talked to Jake since he muttered, 'Cassie's. After school,' at lunch.  
  
It didn't surprise me that he had a plan, though. We each had our jobs as Animorphs. Mine was to be the ruthless warrior. Marco's was to make idiotic jokes. Jake's was to make the plans. To figure out how we would get through life-and-death situation after life-and-death situation.  
  
I wouldn't have traded with him for the world.  
  
She frowned. "If he didn't tell you . . . "  
  
I rolled my eyes. What, was Cassie going to get paranoid with me now? "Cassie, he just hasn't had the chance. We haven't been alone all day."  
  
"Well, we can't kill her. And Jake doesn't think we can handle taking care of her, so . . ."  
  
"So we release her into the wild?"  
  
"Nope," she said. "We're going to make her a nothlit."  
  
"*What*?" I shrilled. "No, no, no! That's ridiculous! Do you know what we'd have to *do*?"  
  
"Give her the morphing power."  
  
"Yes!" I shouted, throwing my hands into the air in frustration. "Does that strike you as a problem, at all? Because it strikes me as one!"  
  
Cassie reached up and pulled my arm down. It's one of her little calming gestures she uses when I'm getting a little too hot to handle. "What are our other options?" she asked gently.  
  
"We could kill her," I suggested.  
  
"Rachel, you know that's not an option. This is a sentient being, even if she is in a different shape than us. Killing her would be like killing another human. Actually, it would be like killing a baby, since she's about that helpless here on Earth."  
  
"Okay, okay, so we don't kill her. We just let her go in the forest."  
  
Cassie shook her head. We both knew that it came to the same thing. There was no way a Helmacron could survive without aid on Earth.  
  
"Well, we sure can't take care of her," I said.  
  
"No," she agreed, "We can't."  
  
I frowned. Somebody had to watch her if she remained in Helmacron form. Not us. But somebody who wouldn't be weirded out by the fact that they were being asked to baby-sit a tiny alien for half a century.  
  
"Hey," I said, "What about the Chee?"  
  
"What about the Chee?" Cassie echoed back.  
  
"The Chee could watch her for us, right?"  
  
Cassie shook her head. "I already checked. Erek said they can't do that. Something about remaining neutral."  
  
"Yeah right," I snorted. "The Chee are about as neutral as the Ellimist."  
  
"Well, not in the Yeerk war," she amended. "Neutral to the Helmacron Empire."  
  
"Oh." I kicked the dirt, not much liking the look of things. "The free Hork-Bajir?"  
  
"Rachel, they could never keep her safe. You know I love them, but . . ."  
  
"But it's just a little easy to imagine her being stepped on as they roll out of bed in the mornings," I finished.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
I began to pace. "Okay. So. Can't kill her. We can't keep her as she is, or release her as she is. The only way she'll ever be safe on Earth is if she's bigger." I looked at her with a sudden grin. "Hey, do you think we could blow her up a little with a shrinking ray in reverse?"  
  
"What, and have a person-sized Helmacron wandering around? Yeah, like that won't attract attention."  
  
I grimaced. "Good point. That leaves . . ."  
  
"Nothlit."  
  
I groaned. "I have a bad feeling about this, Leia." 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

"Like I told Cassie," I said, "I have a bad feeling about this."  
  
"The Force is strong in this one," Marco intoned.  
  
Cassie looked up in sudden interest. "Is *that* what it's from? Star Wars?"  
  
"What?" Jake asked.  
  
"The whole, 'I have a bad feeling about this, Leia,' thing!"  
  
Leia? Tobias asked.  
  
"I called Cassie that," I confessed. "Earlier."  
  
"But that's not right," Marco frowned. "They never say that in the movies."  
  
"Sure they do!" I objected. "All the time!"  
  
No, Marco's right, Tobias said. Luke says it to Han, Han says it to Chewie, and I think Threepio says it to Artoo. But nobody ever says it directly to Leia.   
  
"Like, 'Beam me up, Scotty,'" Marco nodded.  
  
"What?" Cassie and I chorused, utterly lost.  
  
"In Star Trek! Nobody ever actually said that line, even though everybody associates it with the show. In fact, Kirk generally just said, 'Kirk to Enterprise: Energize.'"  
  
I looked around. Ax was off babysitting the Helmacron. The rest of us were standing out in the field just next to Cassie's barn. It's out of sight from the house, but more exposed than we generally like to be. Tobias was in the air, flying cover for us.  
  
You know, it scares me sometimes. We're five average teens. There was nothing special about any of us, before Elfangor came along. Yet we are humanity's last great hope. While we're quoting science fiction shows . 'I *weep* for the species.'  
  
Preed. "Titan A.E.."  
  
"Oh. What. Ever!" I blustered. "The point is: I don't like this nothlit thing."  
  
"But you don't disagree with it," Jake said.  
  
"No," I admitted. "I can't see any other way of handling the little creep."  
  
"See, Jake, I told you," Marco grinned.  
  
"Cassie, do you have it?" Jake asked.  
  
In response, Cassie jostled the backpack in which she was carrying the blue box. "Right here," she said.  
  
"Okay," Jake said. "Let's-"  
  
I cut him off. "Hey!"  
  
"Oh, sorry. Your line."  
  
"Let's do it!"  
  
Laughing, we signaled Tobias to let Ax know it was time. A few minutes later, we watched a disturbingly pretty boy holding something in his hands teeter out of the forest.  
  
"I always want to beat him up when he's in human morph," Marco mused.  
  
Don't even joke about that, Tobias said. He used to be kind of a bully magnet, back in school. Although, I have to admit, I know what you mean.   
  
"Here is the Helmacron, Prince Jake," Ax said, holding out his hand. Then, as an afterthought, "Macron. Mack, mack. Kron!"  
  
"Thanks, Ax," Jake smiled indulgently. Then he looked down at the Helmacron. "Okay . . . um . . . Helmacron. Here's what we're going to do. You know about our blue box, right?"  
  
The blue box of transforming power! she squeaked. Yes, what of it?   
  
"We've decided to do you a favor," Jake said. "If you stay in any morph for five hours, you end up living the rest of your life as the thing you morphed."  
  
Five hours? Since when? I shot Tobias a quizzical look.  
  
A little disinformation, he explained. If she decides not to go along with us after she gets the morphing ability, she'll think she has five hours in morph instead of just two.   
  
I nodded. Made sense. It was surprisingly sneaky, though. Probably Marco's idea.  
  
" . . . and so, for all those reasons," Jake was saying, "we have decided it would be best for you to permanently become an Earth animal. For everybody's safety."  
  
There was a moment of silence as the Helmacron absorbed this. Well, she said slowly, I would be amenable to that proposal.   
  
"Why?" I demanded. "It's a perfectly fair deal! What's your problem with it?" It was just like a Helmacron to refuse her one lifeline.  
  
Amenable means "open to," Rachel. She agrees to the plan, Tobias murmured.  
  
"Oh." I felt my ears redden. Why couldn't aliens use small, normal words?  
  
"Okay, then," Jake said. "Here we go. Cassie?"  
  
On cue, Cassie produced the blue box from her knapsack. It glowed gently in the afternoon light. We all stared at it in something like hushed reverence. This single cube had caused more pain and suffering . . . I thought back to David. Remembered the last time I was with him. Wondered if he was still alive, out on that rock . . .  
  
I was jerked out of my morose thoughts as Ax tipped the Helmacron off of his hand and onto the top of the blue box. It glowed a little brighter. Thrummed slightly. The Helmacron probably felt a tingly warmth fizz through her body. That was it.  
  
Is the ceremony complete? She asked.  
  
"Yup," Marco said. "Welcome to the club. Enjoy your stay. And please morph something else as soon as possible so we can get back to dealing with the Yeerks."  
  
Her tiny body jerked. Yeerks!? she exclaimed.  
  
"Yeah. From what we've seen, you people have heard of them before."  
  
See, Helmacrons don't like Yeerks. As in really, really, really don't like them. They've got some kind of history that seems to run pretty deep. This Helmacron's reaction was pretty typical. It involved running around, yelling "Neep! Neep!" randomly, and yanking out little steel swords and sticking them into things. Except that she didn't have a sword, so she kept reaching for hers, realizing she didn't have it, and running around anyway. After a few seconds, she grew tired and stopped.  
  
"Are you done?" Marco asked.  
  
Yes, she panted.  
  
"Okay, then," Jake said. "Cassie, what morph can she use?"  
  
"We're thinking dolphin, octopus, starfish, anemone, or shark," she said.  
  
All aquatic animals, I noticed. That made perfect sense. Anything deep in the sea would have minimal contact with humans. When you're dealing anything as unstable as a Helmacron, getting them away from humanity, even trapped as a nothlit, sounds like a good idea. Although . . .  
  
"Not starfish," I said. I have personal experience with the starfish morph. Way too personal of a personal experience.  
  
Cassie had pulled some glossy pictures, probably cut from magazines, out of her knapsack. Pictures of the animals she had just named. "This one's the dolphin," she said, holding them up for the Helmacron to see. "That's the octopus. There's the anemone, and this guy's the shark. I'd recommend the dolphin, he's my favorite."  
  
The Helmacron stared up at the pictures. Opotcus, she said, after a moment.  
  
Cassie and Jake exchanged a look. "It's pronounced 'octopus.' Okay," Cassie said. "Then we're going to have to take a trip to the Gardens. We can get your morph there. But before we go, there's just one thing I want to clear up."  
  
Yes?   
  
"What's your name?"  
  
Mirixzu.   
  
"Did she just say her name was Mary Sue?" asked Marco.  
  
"No," Cassie corrected. "Meeree-Kszu."  
  
"That's too hard to pronounce," Marco said dismissively. "We'll just call her Mary Sue."  
  
Have I just been renamed? "Mary Sue" asked.  
  
Yes. This is a sign of acceptance in human culture, Ax informed her.  
  
Ah.   
  
"Right," I agreed. "C'mon, Mary Sue. Let's do it." 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Okay, Jake said. Let's remember one thing. This isn't an acquiring party, it's a surgical strike operation. Get in, get the morph, get out. Get it?   
  
Got it, Marco responded immediately.  
  
Good.   
  
"Get it, got it, good?" Man, you'd think they had been practicing. I commented privately to Tobias. He was several hundred feet away, wheeling above the Gardens with the rest of us. After some hesitation, Tobias had morphed a seagull. Tobias doesn't like morphing seagull.  
  
It's from some old movie, he returned snippily in private thoughtspeech.  
  
We spiraled lower in the air. Mary Sue was clinging to my feathers. I was still performing the role of guardian for the little alien. Just a few more hours, and we would be rid of her forever.  
  
Sure is busy today, Cassie said, swooping down. A whole lot of people and . . . hey! A ton of junk food!   
  
That got our attention. See, the seagull body is good for a lot of things. Nobody notices them flying around. They're great for landing out in the middle of the sea. And they notice junk food. They seriously notice junk food.  
  
Little girl with cotton candy.  
  
Old woman with bag of pretzels.  
  
Pizza! Some punk with a whole pizza all to himself!  
  
Before I could reign myself in, I hit pavement and began hopping towards Mr. Pizza.  
  
Hey! Let's not lose control here, guys! We're on a mission, remember? Jake reminded us from somewhere above.  
  
I intimidated a real gull into backing off. That pizza was so mine, if the punk dropped any. And maybe even if he didn't.  
  
But, Prince Jake, Ax complained from the mass of seagulls wheeling and diving, there may be Controllers in this crowd. We would not wish to attract undue attention by not behaving like normal seagulls.   
  
Marco snorted. Right, Jake. It's a matter of planetary security that Ax steal that bag of Cheeze-Its.   
  
I could hear the smile in Jake's thoughtspeech. Okay, good point. You guys can have a *little* fun out there. But don't attract attention.   
  
I scarcely even listened to him. Mr. Pizza was watching me. Smiling. Any second, he was going to throw some sausage my way.  
  
Come on. Come on . . .  
  
He was actually lifting his arm to throw the meat when he was joined by a friend. I mean, come on! I let out an offended squawk and took to the air.  
  
As I gained altitude, I heard the friend speak in a low, furtive voice. "Hey, Zack. Hannah said to tell you that it's bright out here today."  
  
"Bright?" Zack repeated. "Great. Just great."  
  
Weirdoes, I muttered moodily.  
  
Okay, Jake announced, everybody circle the dumpster with the graffiti twice. I need to get a headcount, then we need to go.   
  
I looked around. Spotted the dumpster. It was big, green, with the Gardens logo painted onto it. On the top, the letters F.C.R. were spray painted in bright yellow. I gained some altitude, and looped lazily around it, taking note of which other gulls joined me.  
  
Good. We all here? Rachel?   
  
Right here.   
  
Marco?   
  
Yo.   
  
Jake quickly counted us, then had Cassie dip into a quick dive to identify herself. Everybody follow Cassie to the aquariums.   
  
Slowly, in big zigzags and loops, we all made our way to a big, modern building bearing "Ocean: Earth" in futuristic letters ten feet tall.  
  
This is it, Cassie said.  
  
Great. Now we just demorph and head in.   
  
One thing before we do, Jake, Marco interrupted. Has anybody else heard a lot of people talking about how bright it is?   
  
Yeah, what's up with that? Tobias asked. Three different groups were talking about it.   
  
I have heard several mentions of unusually high diurnal illumination as well, Ax said.  
  
I heard that, too, I said. So they think it's bright. So what? They're probably all just computer nerds who never see the light of day.   
  
Except that it's not that bright, Marco said. It's actually pretty cloudy out here.   
  
Why are you humans discussing lighting? came Mary Sue's high pitched voice. I had almost forgotten she was there at all. She was unusually quiet, for a Helmacron.  
  
It's just weird. They way they're saying it is kind of secretive, too Marco said. Maybe I'm paranoid, but . . .   
  
Maybe? I scoffed. *Maybe*? There's no "maybe" here, Marco. You are *seriously* paranoid. I paused, then added, And I mean that in a good way.   
  
Gee, thanks.   
  
Jake flapped to gain altitude. So, what are you thinking, Marco?   
  
I'm thinking that we should be extra-careful. There's something weird going on here.   
  
Okay, Jake said. We'll watch ourselves. Let's land in that corner, by the back. We can demorph without being seen there.   
  
We flew down, one by one, spacing ourselves out. As it happened, I was the last to go down. I began my dive, but flared my wings and spun back higher at the sight of a familiar face. A very, very unwelcome face.  
  
Chapman. Our school's vice principal.  
  
Seeing a vice principal outside of school is bad to start with. Add to that the fact that he's a pretty important Controller, and the last person you'd expect to see kicking back at the Gardens, and you know you've got trouble.  
  
"All right, people!" he shouted to a large group that tagged after him. "Sharing Group Fifteen, listen up! We're going into the aquarium, then over to the rides! I want you all to remember that the whole Sharing organization is here today to promote membership. Be friendly, and talk to anybody who will listen!" The whole group nodded.  
  
Shoot.  
  
Shoot, shoot, shoot.  
  
The whole Sharing. Oh, man.  
  
"And remember," Chapman added, "It's bright out here today, so be on guard against any unexpected guests. You know who I mean." There was serious danger in his eyes as he added those last words. Then, he put on a phony grin. "Let's have fun!"  
  
Suddenly, it clicked. 'Bright out here' was code for the Andalites.  
  
Andalite bandits.  
  
Us.  
  
The whole Sharing was here, and they were expecting trouble.  
  
Minutes later, we were hauling tail feather.  
  
I motion, Marco gasped, that we postpone this mission until tomorrow.   
  
I second that, Tobias said, demorphing as he flew. 


	16. Chapter Sixteen

I am so not going into the details of what happened the next day. The really short version is that Mary Sue and I came back to the Gardens alone, acquired the octopus, and bugged out. And, just for the record? Octopus bites are painful, and Helmacrons don't seem to understand the words, "No, Mary Sue, you can't knock an angry octopus out with a corn dog."  
  
We were walking to the skateboard park near the Gardens. Cassie and I were meeting up there, to take Mary Sue down to the ocean. There we would spend two hours with her before releasing her into the wild. Jake and I were fine with my doing it on my own, but Cassie felt she had a moral obligation to be there.  
  
Cassie feels she has moral obligations about a lot of things.  
  
I was feeling cranky. Cassie, on the other hand, looked positively chipper as she joined us.  
  
"I get it," she said as she walked up.  
  
"Hi to you, too. You get what?"  
  
"Andalite. Anda - *light*. Where there's a lot of light, it's bright, right?"  
  
"That dumb Sharing code?"  
  
"That dumb Sharing code."  
  
Ah. A wordplay. I had suspected as much.   
  
"Hi, Mary Sue," Cassie said. She looked at me for a second. "Um . where are you?"  
  
I am seated inside of Rachel's right ear, she announced.  
  
"Oh." I saw a look of distaste cross Cassie's face. I could understand. Actually, I felt the same way. Aliens in ears kind of have bad connotations for us.  
  
"Beach, ho!" I sighed. "You know, we could be driving now."  
  
"If," Cassie said.  
  
"Yep."  
  
Fortunately, the beach isn't too far from the Gardens. We had decided not to fly, since it was so nice. I mean, yes, the thermals would have been spectacular, but some days you just have to be human.  
  
The beach was crowded. When you've got weather that nice in March, you can't help but have crowded beaches. "You know, Cassie," I sighed, "we should be out here. Landing some sun. Catching some surf. Listening to some KrayZ."  
  
"*You* listen to KrayZ and the Loons?" Cassie gasped.  
  
"Don't you dare tell Marco," I warned her. I shook my hair in the breeze. The magic of the spring air was starting to help me forget about the little scene at the octopus tank. "Today is a seriously nice day. Whaddya say that after the two hours is up, we grab our bathing suits and sun out for a while. I even promise I won't make you . what?"  
  
Cassie was shooting me panicked looks. "You mean, after the five hours is up, right? Because it takes five hours to become a nothlit, remember?"  
  
"Oh." I would have cursed, but Mary Sue *was* sitting in my ear. I had spaced out, and forgotten our little deception. "Yeah. Right. Five hours. You know me, always getting 'five' and 'two' mixed up."  
  
"Um, yeah," she bluffed. "You always have had trouble with that."  
  
"Yep. Always."  
  
Cassie forced a laugh. "Mary Sue, there was this time in eighth grade where she flunked a whole math class because she got those numbers mixed up. The teacher didn't figure it out until the last week of school!"  
  
"Yeah," I chuckled. "Old Mrs. Withers sure was mad at me."  
  
"Mmhm," Cassie nodded. "Sure was."  
  
Ah. Mary Sue said.  
  
I exchanged a look with Cassie. I'm not a religious person, but I definitely prayed at that moment. If Mary Sue figured out that it only took two hours to become a nothlit, and then decided she didn't want to be one, Cassie and I were in some deep Taxxon filth.  
  
Cassie and I tried to keep up a normal conversation, but we were both worried about whether or not we had fooled Mary Sue. Eventually, we reached a rocky spot on the beach, solitary enough to let Mary Sue morph. I took her from my ear and held her over the water.  
  
"Okay," I said. "Go octopus."  
  
She looked up at me. I swear she smiled.  
  
I will, she said. But not for longer than two hours. I have decided not to permanently become an octopus.   
  
Cassie and I exchanged a long, agonized look.  
  
"What do you mean?" I blustered. "It isn't two hours, it's five hours until you become a nothlit."  
  
Simple human, I am a Helmacron! We are awesomely advanced beings! You glory in your bloated brain, but it is no match for our intellectual agility! Do you not suppose that I can see directly through your paltry falsifications? I know it only takes two hours in order to be permanently confined to one shape. And I have made my choice to refuse that life. Instead, I will graciously assist you in the defeat of the Yeerk Empire.   
  
"Not. Good," Cassie said.  
  
"Nope," I agreed. "Not good." 


	17. Chapter Seventeen

A/N: I repent in dust and ashes for taking so long to update, and for converting over to a different thoughtspeech format. I fought with FFN for a long time, trying to figure out how to make regular brackets work, but they wouldn't. So, for this chapter, at least, I was forced to use { }'s. I really, really hated to do this. If anybody out there knows how to make FFN accept regular thoughtspeech brackets, I would *LOVE* some instruction. Thank you for your patience and your support. And now . . . on with the show, this is it!  
  
-------------------  
  
"No. No, no, no, no, no, no."  
  
"Marco . . ." Cassie sighed.  
  
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!"  
  
"Marco," Jake said.  
  
"Absolutely not! We have progressed beyond the point of insanity!"  
  
{Marco,} Tobias began.  
  
"Rachel pulling a Jekyll and Hyde act was insane. Going to the Iskoort homeworld was insane. Anytime Ax was in Cinnabon was insane. This is beyond all of that!"  
  
"Marco, would you please shut up!?" I shouted. "You're not helping!"  
  
He scowled, folding his arms and leaning up against the wall of the barn.  
  
{I do not understand,} Mary Sue said. {I have offered to assist you in your battle against the Yeerks. Why are you not jubilating?}  
  
Jake looked at Cassie. Cassie stared wordlessly at the floor.  
  
Well, somebody had to be blunt with Miss Ego. "Because, Mary Sue," I said, "we don't know if we can trust you."  
  
{Of course you can! I am a Helmacron!}  
  
"Strike one," Marco muttered.  
  
{Not only a Helmacron, but a Helmacron female!}  
  
"Strike two."  
  
{In addition, I also now possess the transforming power, as do the rest of you!}  
  
"Strike three. Yeeeeeeee'rrrre OUT!"  
  
{I do not understand,} Mary Sue repeated.  
  
{Marco is referencing a human game, Mary Sue. In essence, he is attempting to communicate that he does not believe any of the reasons listed are sufficient to establish a firm trust relationship between us. I would tend to agree.}  
  
Jake cleared his throat. He had been watching the rest of us. Letting Cassie think. Letting Marco rail. Letting me steam. Now, he frowned down at the Helmacron. "Look, Mary Sue, here's the problem. We have to be very careful what we do. We have to maintain total secrecy, all the time. And on top of the fact that we really have no reason to believe that you wouldn't sell us out to the Yeerks in a minute --- "  
  
"NEEP!"  
  
" --- there are also problems with your staying a Helmacron. Where will you live? How will you survive?"  
  
"Yeah," Marco said. "How do we make sure some baby bunny doesn't inhale you?"  
  
{All mere technicalities,} Mary Sue said dismissively. {The point is, you now have a formidable ally on your side. Me.}  
  
"Funny," Marco said. "Seems to me like we have a formidable idiot on our hands."  
  
{Then she is in good company,} Ax snorted from the shadows. I looked up at him in surprise. He glared back at us accusingly. {With all due respect, this should never have been allowed to happen in the first place. We should not have agreed to care for her, or given her the morphing ability. I was concerned from the outset that it was poor judgment to get involved. This entire situation could have simply been avoided if we had done as I suggested initially, Prince Jake.}  
  
We stared. For Ax, that was pretty close to a tirade. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, though. He had made it perfectly clear how he felt about the situation from the start, and had been sullen since Mary Sue arrived.  
  
"But Ax-man, don't sugarcoat it. Tell us how you really feel," Marco said, breaking the uncomfortable silence.  
  
I looked at Jake, then back at Ax. Both of them had been acting stressed- out lately. I wondered why. I mean, yes, a war with brain-stealing slugs will make you stressed, but we'd been through tougher times than these. Something weird was up.  
  
Cassie stared at the ground.  
  
Jake stood up, his jaw set. "Okay, Ax, so what do you suggest we do now?"  
  
{Now?} Ax echoed blankly.  
  
"Yeah. You want to be the alien-issues adviser. What do you advise we do with the alien?"  
  
Ax hesitated. Obviously, he had not been expecting Jake to call upon him for an immediate solution. {Well, we cannot allow her to wander alone. And we are unable to trap her, as all bodies she might morph are larger than her natural form. We could . . .} he swayed his tail in a cutting motion.  
  
"No. Okay, Ax, I want to listen to you," Jake said firmly. "But I refuse to kill her. She hasn't done anything wrong."  
  
"Aside from whatever it was she was banished for," Marco muttered.  
  
{Captain, listen to me,} said Mary Sue.  
  
"Who?"  
  
"She means you, Jake."  
  
{I recognize that I have placed you in a quandary. You refuse to terminate me, yet you cannot simply allow me to exist on my own, for fear of my betraying you or being accidentally killed. Your preference would be for me to exist in some Earth creature form, far away from human habitation. This is, however, not an acceptable proposal to my mind. Therefore, you are left only one option. You must allow me to join your army.}  
  
I looked at Jake. Jake looked at Cassie. Cassie looked at the ground. Ax looked just plain mad. Marco rolled his eyes. Tobias rustled in the rafters.  
  
{She has a point,} Tobias said.  
  
"Oh, yes," Marco said. "Goody. Let's make another David, only this time, let's make sure she's a super-egotistical alien the size of a dust mote. That's just beautiful."  
  
"Okay," Jake said. "One more vote. But we're not leaving the barn until this is unanimous."  
  
"Prepare to starve," Marco growled.  
  
We stayed in the barn for the next three hours, arguing in huge logical and emotional circles. Cassie's dad came in once, and Ax barely avoided being discovered. Cassie silently mucked out all the horse stalls in the time it took us to come to a consensus. We were all frustrated, tired, and confused by the end.  
  
Marco agreed fairly quickly, after he stopped whining. He's got a tactician's mind. He saw that the only way out of this mess was to accept Mary Sue as an Animorph. At least, for the time being.  
  
The rest of the time was spent in convincing Ax. It took the combined efforts of all six of us, including Mary Sue, to get him to agree. You think mules and toddlers are stubborn. Try to talk an Andalite into something he's dead set against.  
  
But, about ten minutes before the point where I probably would have snapped from the sheer frustration of it all, Ax finally agreed. The whole group breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
I held my throbbing head in my hands. I'm pretty sure I spoke for everybody when I said, "Welcome to the Animorphs, Mary Sue. Cassie, break out the Tylenol." 


	18. Chapter Eighteen

"Okay, Mary Sue. I want to know why I'm always babysitting you." I pulled the Helmacron out of my ear and put her on my dresser. "No, really. Why me? Since when is Rachel the official alien-guard of the group? I mean, now that you're a member and everything, shouldn't we get you someplace of your own?"  
  
My head still ached from all the debating. We had done it. We had all agreed, in the end, that we had to do it. We'd made a seventh Animorph. Again. But you know, if I had sat down and made a list of all the species we had encountered that I would never want on the team, Helmacrons would have been right at the top. Yet here I was. And here was Mary Sue. Morph- capable. Informed. An Animorph.  
  
I hated to imitate Marco, but I had to agree with him this time. This was insane.  
  
{Your captain obviously wishes to honor you by assigning you to protect me. You must be her favorite.}  
  
"His favorite," I corrected automatically. "And no, that'd be Cassie."  
  
{Cassie is a male, correct?}  
  
"No."  
  
{But he is servile and docile! He must be male.}  
  
"You know, I don't think I have the energy to deal with this right now," I said, flinging myself onto my bed. "You're a part of the team now . . . can I trust you to stay out of trouble for a couple minutes while I take a power nap?"  
  
{A power nap?}  
  
"Yeah." I rubbed my eyes slowly. "I'm going to sleep for five minutes, and when I awake, I will be strong and beautiful again."  
  
{You are not very beautiful now. Your head is freakishly round, and your chin disturbingly smooth. You have a disturbing shortage of legs, while your skin color --}  
  
"Thanks, Mary Sue, that's enough. I'm going to sleep now."  
  
{Five minutes is all the sleep you humans require?}  
  
"Five minutes is all the sleep some of us humans get," I yawned.  
  
{Very well,} she agreed. {I will wait for your power nap.}  
  
I felt the heaviness creep over my body. I hoped I wouldn't have nightmares. The last thing I needed right now were dreams. I just needed a black-out. I tried to recall the last time I had really rested. No mission. No stress. No nightmares.  
  
Two months ago, Cassie and I had gone shopping. She hadn't wanted to, of course. But we had both aced this big history test. We were happy. I teased and prodded and forced her until she came along. She had tried to buy this really horrible orange and pink sweater. I swear, that sweater would have clashed with black pants, it was so bad. I grabbed it from her. "Hey!" she had yelled. "If you're going to make me shop, let me shop!"  
  
"Cassie, this is not shopping. This is hurting yourself. You're like a duck, and I'm like you, and I'm gonna make you get better no matter how much you quack."  
  
She laughed. We were both in a silly mood that day. "Quack," she pronounced, gripping the sleeve stubbornly.  
  
"Cassie, give me the sweater."  
  
"Quack!"  
  
We ended up ripping the sweater, and sprawling across the floor in opposite directions. We didn't get up. We just sat there and laughed. We had laughed so hard that the manager of the store asked us to leave.  
  
"Quack!" Cassie yelled as we stumbled out, still laughing.  
  
I smiled. That had been a good day.  
  
Thank God it was Friday. Why not sleep through the night and wake up around 11:00 tomorrow? There was nothing important happening tonight, was there? No mission? I couldn't remember one. I didn't try very hard. I wriggled under my covers.  
  
"Be good, Mary Sue," I tried to say. The words died on my lips as I drifted off to dreamless sleep.  
  
--------  
  
"FRIDAY!" I yelled, sitting up in bed. I could tell from the shadows on the walls that it had been hours since I went to sleep. "Mary Sue, what day is it?"  
  
{The two hundredth day of the Melvar Season, by the new reckoning,} she responded from the dresser.  
  
I groaned. "Ask an alien what the date is . . . " I stumbled to my feet, blinking at my clock and calendar as I tried to rake my hair back into place. Nine o'clock. Nine PM. Oh, no. I burst out of my room. "Jordan!" I yelled. "Hey, Jordan!" Mom had told her she couldn't go to the party. But that meant absolutely diddly-squat once Jordan had made up her mind. Sara poked her head out of her room at the commotion. "Sara!" I shouted.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Where's Mom?"  
  
"At a meeting with a client," she articulated solemnly. "About him bezzling. What's bezzling?"  
  
Oh, crud. Mom wasn't home. "Where's Jordan?" I asked.  
  
"She gave me cookies not to tell you. Is she in trouble?"  
  
I swore loudly. Then I apologized to a very shocked Sara for using a bad word. I rocketed back into my room and stripped down to my morphing suit.  
  
{What has transpired?} asked Mary Sue.  
  
"Sewage," I answered shortly, before my mouth melted into a beak. I had promised Jake I wouldn't break and smash the party. I had promised no twisted steel or broken pools. I had meant it, too.  
  
Oh well. Good intentions.  
  
{Mary Sue, you're coming with me. We're gonna go crash a party.} I flapped onto the desk, and lowered a claw for her to climb up on.  
  
{What does that mean?}  
  
{It means that I'm not just going to let Jordan get infested.}  
  
{A rescue mission? We are preserving your sister from becoming a victim of the Yeerk abomination?}  
  
{That's right.}  
  
{Exhilarating.}  
  
I swooped out of the window into the evening air. {Good word,} I said, pumping my wings for altitude.  
  
As I flew through the quiet sky, I tried to think past the anger that was boiling inside of me. Sometimes I just feel like Gollum in the Two Towers.  
  
'You know, you shouldn't just fly off and attack this place without talking to Jake first,' said my brain.  
  
'Quiet! This is my sister we're talking about,' said my heart.  
  
'But even if she is in danger, you'll only attract attention to your own identity by singling out one person to save. The Yeerks will wonder why you picked her,' my brain reasoned.  
  
'My sister,' pounded my heart.  
  
Hey, in the movies, they're always saying to follow your heart. I choked back my doubts and flew on pumping adrenaline all the way to Megan's pool. I knew where it was, remembered its shape too well.  
  
{See the water down there, Mary Sue?} I asked.  
  
{Yes.}  
  
{That's where we're going.}  
  
{That's where we're going to bust some heads?} she inquired.  
  
I laughed. {Where did you hear that phrase?}  
  
{Your thoughts have been leaking into thoughtspeech,} she explained.  
  
I would have smiled if I'd had a mouth. {Okay then. Yeah. That's where we're going to bust some heads.} 


	19. Chapter Nineteen

I dove straight down. Flared my wings at the last second to kill my speed and avoid breaking my neck. I was in one of those little stands of trees that decorate a lot of developments. As soon as I touched grass, I began to demorph. My feathers thinned until they were hairlike, then sucked into my skin with a schloooooop! I grew. That is, my top half grew. Soon I was mostly human, trying to balance on regular-sized eagle talons. Eagle talons seem plenty big when you're a bird. Not big enough when you're half human. I toppled over sideways. Got dirt in my mouth.  
  
I had been plenty mad enough before that, thank you.  
  
I finished demorphing fast. I had plenty of energy. Gallons of adrenaline were pumping through my system. I rolled onto my now-human feet, going straight into the elephant morph. "Okay, Mary Sue," I said, as a wiry tail emerged from my lengthening spine. "You stay here. Keep out of trouble. I'll put you somewhere saaoouuuupphhfffft!!"  
  
Morphing is always different. And it can be amazingly gross. This time, my lips had puckered as I'd been speaking, and then had shot out of my face. You know how in cartoons people will get their lips stretched out, so they've got a ten foot tube between their mouth and their face? That's how this was. And it definitely wasn't pretty. I might have even thrown up, but I thought about the vomit traveling all the way down to the end of my lips, and thought better of it. My nose slid down to join my lips, and the whole mess thickened, turned gray, and became my trunk.  
  
I like going grizzly, but in terms of sheer collateral damage, elephant is a better morph. Plus, getting big seemed like a great idea.  
  
{I protest!} Mary Sue said. {I intend to fight alongside you!}  
  
I looked down for her just as my ears got big enough to put Dumbo to shame. I couldn't find her, of course. She's almost too small for me to see with my regular eyes, and elephants have worse eyesight than humans. I might as well have searched around for a certain bacteria. I liked this girl. She had some serious spunk. {Hey, nice thought. But you don't have a battle morph yet.}  
  
{Who needs an Earth body to "kick butt"?} she demanded. {I shall fight as all Helmacrons, in my own awe-inspiring form!}  
  
Man, she was crazier than I was. {Well, where are you? I at least need to carry you in there. It's a long walk for you.}  
  
{I am seated on the tip of your tubular nasal extension.}  
  
I was half-elephant at this point. I can't control morphs at all. Cassie is the only one of us who can. This particular morph was happening very slowly. My head had almost completely morphed, but most of the rest of me was still very-large Rachel. I looked around. To my right, past the trees, was Megan's house. Somebody was screaming and pounding drums, a lot of people were yelling to be heard overtop of it. To my left, past the trees, was a darkened house. It had a trellis over the door. Flowers everywhere. A birdhouse in the front lawn. Another one in the back lawn. It screamed "Grandma." It was dark. Apparently Grandma had decided to go out for the evening. I didn't blame her.  
  
{Hold on, Mary Sue.}  
  
{I am secure.}  
  
I crawled on what were still somewhat-human hands and knees to the edge of the trees. I stretched out my trunk and wrapped it around the lovingly painted mailbox. I snapped it off, and retreated back into the forest.  
  
{Is that a weapon?} Mary Sue inquired.  
  
{Nope,} I replied shortly, snapping open the lid. I stuck my trunk in, and shook it gently.  
  
{What the --- Rachel!! Aaaaah!!}  
  
I slipped my trunk out and slammed the lid shut. Then I tightened it a little more with a squeeze from my trunk. {Sorry, kiddo,} I said, meaning it. {I don't have time to argue with a Helmacron. And I don't want you hurt.}  
  
I ignored Mary Sue's protestations and concentrated on finishing the morph. I had a sister to save! How much time had I wasted? Was it already too late?  
  
{What the - Oh, man. Rachel, that had just better not be you going big and gray down there!!}  
  
{Tobias!?} I yelped. Oh, great. Perfect. Just what I *didn't* need!  
  
{Rachel, what are you doing!? You're not supposed to be here!}  
  
I ignored him, trying to speed up the morph. Elephant already, elephant! My slow morph was mainly due to the fact that I could barely concentrate. The arrival of Tobias didn't help things.  
  
{Rachel, stop now. Think what you're doing!}  
  
{I'm saving my sister,} I grunted.  
  
{No, you're not! You're going to bust up the place and maybe kill somebody! If she isn't infested, she'll be scared half to death for no reason! If she is, she'll know it's you!}  
  
I faltered. Could he be right? No, no way! {I've gotta get in there!} I shouted.  
  
{So go in there,} Tobias said quickly, trying to reason past my anger and confusion. {Do it as a human. Find out if there are Yeerks there. Get Jordan out. But don't do something that will wind up dooming Earth, just because you didn't stop to think!}  
  
At that moment, the elephant's instincts kicked in. It wasn't angry. It wasn't scared. It wasn't confused. It was slow. Peaceful. The opposite of my mind. I stopped. I thought.  
  
"Brrrrrrrrrrrouuuuuuuugghhh!!" I trumpeted out of sheer frustration.  
  
{Quiet!} Tobias shouted desperately. {Okay, that was all right . . . the band covered you. Now morph out, Rachel. Do this the right way. Do this the smart way. Do it.}  
  
I felt the fog of anger lifting. I was still angry. About as angry as I get, actually. But Tobias had been able to inject some sense into my anger.  
  
If I rushed in, I could expose us all. If I did, we would be infested. Jordan would be infested. Earth would be lost.  
  
I began to demorph. I shrank. My hair sprouted from the elephant's skull. Human hands and feet appeared at the end of tree trunk legs. Then a suspicion crept into my mind. Before I lost thoughtspeech, I asked, {Tobias, were you watching me, or just flying by?}  
  
{Just flying by this time, Rachel. But I may have to start --} he stopped in the middle of his sentence. Weighed his words. {Start accepting guardian angel pay if I keep this up.} It wasn't what he had started to say.  
  
My human mouth more or less reappeared, and I laughed thickly. Guardian angel pay. Whatever heavenly currency God pays our angels, it isn't nearly enough. But at the same time, I felt the sting of the words Tobias hadn't said. If I kept acting like this, he would have to start watching me.  
  
I was human again. I was in a leotard - close enough to a bathing suit to fit in at the party. Mary Sue had grown silent again. I looked with regret down at the crumpled mailbox. Then I jogged up to Megan's front door.  
  
I broke the doorbell. I just meant to push it. Kind of. But, anyway, I broke it. The noise around the house was deafening. There was no way anybody heard me. I reached for the knob when the door flew open. I found myself staring into the watery eyes of a pale, gothic girl. "HEY!!" I yelled, trying to make myself heard. I thought the noise was bad with the door shut. With it opened, I was expecting my ears to start bleeding soon. "I'M RACH -- "  
  
But the girl hadn't opened the door to let me in. She raced past me and hunched over the bushes, shaking and retching. I guess she'd already had a couple drinks.  
  
I glowered and stepped into the room.  
  
Have you ever been to Hot Topic in the mall? Any punk store, actually. One of these places where the walls are painted black, and the lights are funky colors, and the roof is exposed wiring, and you feel crowded and suffocated and deaf? Why do people make places like that? Is it cool to offend all the human senses at once?  
  
Okay, Hot Topic does sell some good shirts. But I'm talking about the atmosphere.  
  
Megan had transformed her house into just such a place. It was rank with beer and sweat and vomit. People were staggering, lurching, dancing, standing, laying on the floor, running everywhere. Black cloths had been laid down to cover the carpet, but they ended up bunching and curling through the halls, like the trail of a dirty animal. Over everything was the noise. The walls shook with the percussion. I felt the vibration of the bass in the pit of my stomach. It made me sick. The shrill whine of the electric guitars was like the blade of a Hork-Bajir slicing into my head. And the lead so-called "singer" might have been in Visser Three's torture room from the way he screamed.  
  
"If Jordan is here, I am going to kill her," I said simply.  
  
"Yeah," a tall guy said, stumbling into me, "I want more beer, too." 


	20. Chapter Twenty

I'm hoping you've never been to a party like this, so you may not know exactly what it was like. I should warn you before I describe the scene that this was not a place for kids. Aside from the Yeerk pool, it was the most unpleasant place I've been in a long time. Everywhere people stumbled around like blind beasts. Everywhere I saw things I didn't want to see. And everywhere, over everything, was the so-called music. I found out that the band was called Animal Abuse. That was a completely appropriate name. Eight guys were building the Wall O' Beer. The stack of empty beer cans was six feet high, four feet wide when I passed it the first time. A few minutes later, it had added a foot in each direction. I almost sliced my feet open on broken glass scattered around. And all that was only inside.  
  
Animal Abuse was playing outside, but I think that the house was actually being used as one giant speaker. They actually seemed quieter outside. But that's not to say it approached quiet. When I say "quieter," I mean as in your ears only felt like they were going to fall off, instead of like knives were being driven through them. Outside, if possible, the scene was even more chaotic. A snack table had lost a leg, and trays full of food were smashed into the grass. Somebody had saved the punchbowl, setting it lovingly in the birdbath. That same somebody was kneeling, with her face submerged in the punch.  
  
I was edging towards the spite fence that bordered the house. It was quieter there, less packed with staggering, flailing bodies. I looked up at the sky. Could Tobias just find Jordan from the air?  
  
I didn't even want to look at the pool. The pool was the focal point of all the activity. Everything else I've mentioned was tame, compared to the twisting mass of bodies and alcohol that was the pool. This was a party to celebrate the lifting of the water restrictions. I guess you could call it celebrating. But it only took a quick glance at the pool to make me start to suspect that the Yeerks weren't involved in this. I didn't think they would waste their time with anything so senselessly idiotic and damaging to their host bodies.  
  
"Hey, cousin!" I whirled to see Tom smiling at me. "I didn't know you were coming tonight!"  
  
Okay, so the Yeerks were involved. I can think of a couple people I would have been less happy to see than Tom. People like Visser Three. The Drode. David. Crayak. But Tom was right up there on the list. "Oh. Hi," I said. "I'm looking for Jordan. Have you seen her?"  
  
He shook his head. "You seem tense, Rachel. Aren't you having a good time?"  
  
I frowned. "No," I said. There was no point in telling a blatant lie that wouldn't help me. "This isn't my kind of party."  
  
His smile became more knowing than ever. "Mine either. Me, I like the Sharing. Camping, beach parties, community stuff . . . this is just so out of control," he said, gesturing towards the pool.  
  
Yeah, Yeerk. That's right. The Sharing is about control. I know all about that. "I guess," I said, looking over Tom's shoulder for Jordan. Where was she?  
  
"You should really come out to the Sharing some time, Rachel. Hey, maybe we can get our families together and go out to a cookout one of these Wednesdays!"  
  
And maybe then, as a follow-up act, we could all take lethal injections and play volleyball until we died! Wouldn't that be fun? "I dunno," I said. "I don't think the Sharing is for me."  
  
"I think it's more for you than you realize," Tom said.  
  
What was that supposed to mean? Was that a threat? Did he suspect? "Oh?" I asked guardedly.  
  
"Sure. We've got a gymnastics group, and a bunch of our full members are honor students like you. You can get some great scholarships with a recommendation from the Sharing."  
  
I guess I might have been more tempted if I didn't know that wrapped around Tom's brain was a slug that had made my cousin his prisoner and slave, and was just using Tom's mouth and eyes to harvest me as yet another body for their silent invasion. But I did know, so that killed any attraction the idea might have held for me.  
  
"Thanks, but I like to get ahead by myself. Sorry, Tom. The Sharing just isn't my thing." I forced myself to add, "I guess it's cool for you, but I'm not into it."  
  
Tom gave me a wise look. "You're missing out. At least when you drop Jordan off next weekend, stick around for a couple minutes. You might like it."  
  
My blood froze. "When I drop Jordan off?"  
  
"She's way ahead of you, Rachel. She's going to start coming out when she can. She promised me she'd be at the next meeting. She said you'd probably walk her over to our house. Then I could drive her to the meeting. She's a smart kid. Bet she'll be a full member in no time."  
  
I might have attacked Tom right there and then. For a split second, all I could think of was ripping the slug from his head. For a split second, I wasn't sure I even cared if my cousin got hurt or killed, just so that Yeerk died. I might have lunged at him.  
  
I might not have. I'll never know. At that second, somebody screamed my name.  
  
"Rachel!!" shrieked Megan happily. She sidled up to me. I eyed my old friend warily. Her eyes were bleary. Given the bottle in her hand, it wasn't hard to guess why. She was spiked, squeezed, and painted to the full extremes that her punk style allowed. "You're here? No way! It's so good to see you!" She reached out and squeezed me. Her hands were cold and clammy. I could smell the booze on her breath. I pulled away instinctively. She stared at me. "You look great! Did I invite you? I can't remember." This apparently struck her as very funny, and she laughed unnaturally long and loud. In my face.  
  
"Get sober," I snapped.  
  
"I'm sober," she protested.  
  
I snorted. "Right."  
  
"I've been wanting to talk to you for a long time, Rach," she said. "I don't know how it happened, but we stopped hanging out." I saw tears reddening in her eyes. "Sometimes I really miss all the fun we had together, you know? I mean, I know you're doing your gymnastics thing with Melissa, and that's great, too, but . . . " Her voice faltered.  
  
"No," I said curtly. "I haven't hung out with Melissa for a while now. I'm not really into gymnastics anymore."  
  
Megan turned to wave at some kid who was falling off of the diving board. Then she turned her attention back to me. "What I'm saying is, we should get together, you know?"  
  
"I don't think so," I said.  
  
"Rachel . . . " the Yeerk in Tom's head soothed.  
  
"I don't think so," I repeated, louder. "You've chosen your friends, Megan. You like getting hammered together. Okay. I've given up trying to stop you. But I don't want to ruin my life with you."  
  
She stiffened, as if I had slapped her. And, to be honest, I had wanted to do just that. I had invested a lot of my life into this girl, years ago. Now, she was a hole. And I wasn't even going to pretend I could climb down into her. Her eyes, momentarily lit with interest at my arrival, went dull again. "Okay," she grunted, lifting the bottle to her lips. "Sure. Whatever." She took a long drink, called me an unprintable name, and slinked away.  
  
I glared after her. I clenched my fists at my side. I was so angry. Angry at Megan, angry at Tom, angry at Jordan, angry at myself. I was angry at Tobias, angry at all of the other Animorphs. The only person I wasn't angry with was Mary Sue. And I had locked her in a broken mailbox.  
  
"It's hard, isn't it?" Tom began.  
  
I whirled, barely controlling my desire to lunge out at something, somebody. "Yeah," I snapped. "It sure is hard. It's hard to find Jordan at this party. Seen her?"  
  
He gave me a long look, like he was disappointed in me. Jake has given me the same look. Big difference: Jake gives me that look because he really is disappointed in me. This Yeerk was using it to guilt me. I glared back. Worked my jaw slowly. Finally, he shook his head. "When I talked to her about the Sharing, she was over in that corner." He pointed across the yard.  
  
I stalked off without another word. I refused to feel guilty for what had just happened. I hadn't killed anybody. I being a saint, considering my mood.  
  
I found my sister trying to blend in with the wall, staring in horrified fascination at a young guy who was having vivid hallucinations a few feet away. Jordan was pale, and looked very small and young. I swear she almost cried from relief when she saw me.  
  
"Hey," I said.  
  
"Hey," she sniffed.  
  
"Having fun?"  
  
She wiped her nose, and looked down at her punch. "Oh, yeah," she grimaced.  
  
I grabbed the punch, and tossed it on the ground. "You drink any of that?"  
  
"One sip."  
  
I nodded. "Ready to go?"  
  
The hallucinating teenager rolled over, and began to moan. "Yeah," she said, her eyes not moving. "Yeah, sure."  
  
I wrapped my arm around her shoulder. "Okay." I smiled grimly. "Let's get outta -- "  
  
Just then, I was interrupted by a high-pitched shriek. "Oh, SICK!! Slugs! The Jacuzzi is full of slugs!!" 


	21. Chapter Twenty One

"Ow! Rachel, my shoulder!" Jordan protested. I relaxed my grip. When my heart stopped, I had dug my fingers into her pretty hard.  
  
The reaction among the partygoers was mixed. The ones who were sober enough to understand and care either pushed forward to see the slugs, or pressed away in disgust. The Jacuzzi was in a shady corner, covered by one of those gazebos. The perfect place to quietly draw somebody aside and shove a slug up their ear. But there was nothing quiet about the corner now. The shoving partygoers had become a malcontent mass. Animal Abuse was beginning to have to struggle to make itself heard over the noise of the crowd. Jordan and I were caught near the front of the crowd, just ten feet away from the Jacuzzi.  
  
"I gotta see this," Jordan said, stepping forward.  
  
"No. Stay here." I tightened my grip on her shoulder again.  
  
"What's the matter, Rachel? Scared?"  
  
"Stay here," I repeated harshly. My mind was reeling. How would the Yeerks deal with being discovered. Send in Hork-Bajir to eliminate the witnesses? Probably. But how could I quietly morph and protect Jordan at the same time?  
  
A harsh feedback scream cut through my whirling thoughts. "Heeeeeeeeeey, PEOPLE!" somebody shrieked. All eyes snapped towards the stage. Megan had grabbed the microphone from the lead singer of Animal Abuse, and was now standing on the stage, swaying slightly. Her eyes were wild. Her smiling mouth was filled with tension. This wasn't in the plan. "Are we all having fun yet?"  
  
An unintelligable braying was the only response she received.  
  
"Well, listen up! I wanted to save the Jacuzzi until LATER, but we'll roll with things and do this NOW! The slugs are in there for a REASON!" She paused, obviously to think. Then the penny seemed to drop. "Who here has seen Fear Factor?" she yelled.  
  
The groan from the partygoers indicated most people had. I narrowed my eyes. Where was she taking this?  
  
Megan paced the stage, screaming out an occasional word to grab the attention of the less sober who hadn't caught on yet. Whatever she was up to, she had figured out how she was going to dig herself and the rest of the Yeerks out of this situation. "Tonight, we're gonna be playing our own game of Fear Factor! And boys and girls, do I have some PRIZES for you! Prizes with values upwards of five HUNDRED dollars!"  
  
She had the crowd. They were definitely interested. The shoving stopped.  
  
"The CHEAPEST prize I've got is worth FIVE hundred dollars," Megan repeated. "The most expensive ... two GRAND, kids!"  
  
An appreciative gasp went up from the crowd.  
  
"Yeah, you heard right! So, we've set up a NUMBER of challenges for the bold and the greedy tonight! The first is ... who can stay underwater with the slugs the LONGEST?"  
  
Whatever rank Megan's Yeerk was, it was smart.  
  
The crowd instantly began shouting again, and the shoving started back up. Megan dropped down from the stage, yelling and shoving, clearing a path for herself to the Jacuzzi. There, she climbed up onto the broad edge of the Jacuzzi, and braced herself against a column of the gazebo. "AAARRRIGHT!! Who's gonna be the first? Step right up, kids, the prizes only get BIGGER as we go!"  
  
"I'll do it!" I heard a guy yell. Instantly his buddies were cheering and jeering. He joined Megan on the edge of the Jacuzzi. Jordan was cheering too. I recognized him. He was Ron Baxter, one of the superjocks of the school. He waved to the crowd like a returning general, and they roared their approval of his daring.  
  
Part of me thought, "Oh, good. It's all right if Ron gets infested." Then I hated myself for thinking that.  
  
I looked up at the sky for a red-tailed hawk, but Tobias was nowhere to be seen. 'I hope he's morphing something big,' I thought.  
  
"All right, RON!" Megan exulted. "Now, here are the rules. You have to stay completely submerged for at LEAST twenty seconds, or you get NOTHING! Got it?"  
  
Ron nodded and flexed. He was obviously a litte drunk already.  
  
"Okay, then. Get in there, BIG guy!"  
  
Ron stepped down into the water. I saw him grimace a little, then cover it up with bravado. The crowd began to cheer. "RON! RON! RON! RON!"  
  
He flashed a last smile at all of us, then submerged himself in the shallow pool.  
  
"ONE!" Megan yelled. "TWO!" She gestured encouragingly, and the crowd took up the count.  
  
"THREE! FOUR! FIVE!"  
  
Jordan was screaming with the rest of them. I was trying to think. I couldn't just let this happen. I had to stop it, or get help.  
  
"SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT!"  
  
But I was too near the Jacuzzi to fight my way all the way out of the party with Jordan. Besides, who knew how long it might take to get Jake. Any number of people might be infested before we got back.  
  
"NINE! TEN! ELEVEN!"  
  
Animal Abuse began playing their own version of the Jepoardy theme song. I wouldn't of recognized it had it not been for the electric guitar that occasionally screamed out the basic tune in double time.  
  
"TWELVE! THIRTEEN! FOURTEEN!"  
  
I had to think of something. I saw splashes spill over the side of the pool. Underneath the water, Ron had to be struggling for his humanity.  
  
"FIFTEEN! SIXTEEN! SEVENTEEN!"  
  
And losing.  
  
"EIGHTEEN! NINETEEN! TWENTY!"  
  
Ron exploded from underwater, gasping for air. He crawled out of the pool, coughed, then stood and delivered the same grin.  
  
Or, rather, his new slave master for life did.  
  
"Goooooooooooo RON!!" Megan shrilled. "If nobody else can top that, you get the PRIZE!" She looked over the crowd with a conspiratorial grin. "Does anybody want to TRY topping that? AL-AYY! Go for it, girl!"  
  
Ally, one of the cheerleaders climbed up. It was the same as the first time. The challenge. The posturing. Ally blew a kiss to the crowd instead of flexing, but otherwise, the show was almost identical. Again, I was glad that it was Ally instead of anybody I was close to. And I was guilty for being glad.  
  
The count started up again. At eleven seconds, Ally broke the surface. "My EAR!" she screamed.  
  
Megan reached out and shoved her back under the water. "Uh-UH!" she chided laughingly. "At least twenty seconds, REMEMBER, Ally?" Ally struggled for a few more seconds, then was still. At twenty-five seconds, she broke the surface. As a Controller.  
  
I had to stop this. But how?  
  
"Who's NEXT?"  
  
"ME!" Jordan yelled, wriggling free of my grasp.  
  
"Hey, NO!" I yelled, pouncing on her.  
  
"Whoah, it's the Rachel and JORDAN show!" Megan laughed into the microphone. "Rachel, let the girl come up if she wants to!"  
  
"Rachel, let GO!" Jordan yelled.  
  
I clenched her arm unyieldingly. "Jordan, if you go up there, you will regret it the rest of your life," I hissed into her ear.  
  
"What's wrong, Rachel?" she demanded. "Just because you're too scared to do it, you won't let me? Why do you have to control my life?"  
  
"I'm not scared," I growled.  
  
"WELL! If you're not scared, how about YOU do it, Rachel!" I looked up. Megan was grinning down at me. Grinning like the cat grins at the mouse. "Hey, you guys all remember RACHEL! Who wants to see her go underwater!"  
  
A roar went up from the crowd. Plenty of people at my school know me by sight and reputation. And I don't have a great reputation.  
  
"Rachel, c'mon UP here!" Megan cackled.  
  
"I'll pass!" I yelled.  
  
"Nah," Megan said, her voice quiet in the microphone for a moment. "You won't. GUYS, help me get Rachel in the water!"  
  
The crowd laughed, and pressed in around Jordan and I. I could smell the alcohol on their breath. Then the first pair of hands grabbed me. 


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

You know how sometimes, when you're really scared, you'll get this taste like vomit at the back of your mouth?  
  
"Get off!" I yelled. "Let go!" I twisted and writhed desperately. The faces around me were a confusing blur. Guys and girls alike, all with the same, half-guilty, half-cruel expression as they pushed me forward. But I wasn't going without a fight.  
  
I shoved my elbow backwards hard, connecting with somebody. Their fingers clawed my shoulder as I was propelled forward another two feet. Now one of them was trying to grab my feet. All right, they could have one. I lashed out hard with a vicious kick. I think I may have broken her nose. I bit the arm that was trying to encircle my neck.  
  
I couldn't even hear myself yelling over the din of the clamouring, laughing crowd. But I could hear Megan.  
  
"Grab her legs! Grab her LEGS! Devon, you got her! Careful, you'll -- OUCH! Bet that one hurt."  
  
It sure did. Devon didn't come back for seconds.  
  
Megan's voice was laughing, like she was doing the blow-by-blow for an exciting sport. "Don't let her -- THERE you go! No, guys, more to the LEFT! Okay, that's good, just -- whoah, Rachel, CHILL! It's just a game, right?"  
  
A game. Right. Megan, Tom, and I knew how much of a game this was. I guess if I had been smarter, I wouldn't have made such a big deal out of it. To the normal kids, I must have seemed scared out of my wits. To the Controllers, it must have seemed suspicious.  
  
Neither was good.  
  
I watched as, inch by inch, the Jacuzzi drew nearer. I fought them every poke, bite, grab, bruise, and kick of the way, but there were dozens of them and only one of me. Now I could see the lip of the Jacuzzi. The gently bubbling water. The Yeerks underneath. Megan's smile.   
  
"Okay -- WHOA!! ...OKAY, we're gonna need a couple of big GUYS to keep this wildcat underwater! We're gonna make her WIN this prize if it KILLS her!" She laughed, and the crowd roared its approval.  
  
They thought she was joking.  
  
I was lifted bodily above the pool. I dangled above my worst nightmare for a moment, then they dropped me. With every gymnast instinct I had worked years to develop, I landed on my feet and grabbed the rim, trying to scramble out. I think I stepped on a few Yeerks in the pool.  
  
Oh well.  
  
Two of the football players, Aaron and Howard, stepped over the lip to hold me, at Megan's request. I noticed they stepped very carefully into the pool. Ah, I understood. Controllers.  
  
"Okay, get a good grip on her HEAD. That's it!" she chirped. "Now, push her under on THREE. Ready? One..."  
  
Another countdown.  
  
"Two..."  
  
This time, the one that signaled the doom of the human species.  
  
Here came the three.  
  
"Tsssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!"  
  
"Aaaauuugghhh!! My face! My face!!" Howard released me to clutch at his face. I saw blood between his fingers.  
  
"Tssseeeeeeeeeeer! Tseeeeeeeeeeeeeer!!"  
  
Tobias. I could have kissed him in his hawk body at that moment.  
  
Like a red-tailed demon, he dove, banked, and slashed at every head and face that exposed itself. He was a flapping, ripping, twisting nightmare on wings. Megan curled into a ball beside the pool. "Shoot it!" She screamed, as the microphone scraped on the ground, piercing the air with feedback. "SHOOT it!!"  
  
Apparently, nobody had brought a gun. Everything was in total havoc. I had new respect for Tobias. Compared with a bear or tiger or gorilla, a lone hawk didn't seem like much of a threat. But as a human, without natural weapons, he was scary.  
  
Man, was he scary.  
  
{Rachel, I don't know what the HECK you were doing, but GET OUT OF HERE!} he shouted in my mind.  
  
Out. Yeah, out of the Yeerk pool would be good.  
  
I leapt over the side of the Jacuzzi, and started running for the gate. The scene was utter pandemonium. Everywhere, people were fighting each other to get away from the insane bird. Shattered debris covered the ground, trampled out of recognition. I ran, weaving my way through the crowd, body-slamming or punching when people didn't get out of my way. By the time I reached the gate, most people had crawled under something or gathered together in groups with some kind of weapon to defend themselves. I slammed the gate shut hard behind me, and kept running, straight into the little grove of trees. When I reached the crumpled mailbox I slid down to my knees, trembling, trying to draw breath.  
  
One second away from infestation.  
  
One second away from humanity's total enslavement.  
  
I hunched over, and threw up. I couldn't stop shaking. Tears filled my eyes as I retched. When I was finished, I couldn't get up. I just sat there, quivering, staring down at the stinking mess in front of me.  
  
"Oh, the wonderful life of an Animorph," I croaked, trying to take deep breaths.  
  
Tobias landed in the tree above me. {What happened back there?} he demanded.  
  
I didn't answer.  
  
He was cold and angry. {Rachel, I stopped you from morphing elephant. Then I went to go get backup. When I got back, there you were, knee-deep in Yeerk water, about to be forcibly infested. The Yeerks know an Andalite bandit stopped you in particular from being infested. Do you see the small problem we have here, Rachel?}  
  
I looked up, and wiped my mouth with a shaking hand. "Tobias . . . how about we pretend that I'm just as unhappy as you about this? How about we pretend that I almost had a slug shoved in my ear? How about we pretend that I need you to not be mad at me right now?"  
  
{I just -- } he began, then stopped. Flitted his wings. Looked away.  
  
At the house, Animal Abuse banged out a few pounding notes, then I could hear the indistinct shrill of Megan's voice. I couldn't make out what she was saying, though.  
  
Tobias was silent.  
  
{Could either of you bloated humans explain what has transpired?} a small voice asked.  
  
Oh, yeah. Mary Sue.  
  
{Mary Sue?} Tobias protested. {You're here? Where are you?}  
  
{Trapped inside the somewhat-damaged metal canister,} she said resentfully.  
  
Tobias looked at the mailbox lying on the ground, then at me. I smiled weakly and shrugged. 'Didn't want her to get hurt,' I mouthed.  
  
He dipped his head in a nod. {I'd like to know what happened, too, Mary Sue. Rachel, want to explain yourself?}  
  
There was a roar of approval from Megan's house.  
  
{Quickly?} he added.  
  
I outline what had happened as fast as I could. Then I stopped.  
  
Oh, no.  
  
Jordan.  
  
Where was Jordan?  
  
Apparently, Tobias asked himself the same question. As soon as I stopped, he launched himself into the air, and flew tight circles over Megan's house.  
  
{Uh-oh. Rachel, you'd better get over here. Now.}  
  
I was up and running in zero seconds flat. I pushed aside Megan's gate, and looked around wildly, ready to confront . . .   
  
Nothing. Nobody was in sight, except for four or five people who had drunk themselves to sleep. "What the . . ?" Slowing, I jogged around the side of the house, to the backyard. It had been so full of people five minutes ago. So where had they all gone?  
  
Animal Abuse's instruments stood on the stage, forsaken. The broken birdbath and shattered punchbowl lay silently on the ground. The only sound was the gentle sound of water from the pool and the Jacuzzi.  
  
I approached the Jacuzzi cautiously. Inside, the Yeerk-filled water sloshed solemnly against the sides as bubblers on the bottom agitated its surface. The Yeerks were alone. Helpless.  
  
{I don't see Jordan,} Tobias said.  
  
I stared at the Yeerks. There had to be a couple hundred of them. I remembered the last time I had seen slugs in a Jacuzzi. Back when Jake had been infested.  
  
Well, we had boiled almost all of those slugs. Why not these?  
  
The heat button had an almost hypnotic power as I reached for it. I was killing hundreds of sentient, feeling beings. Cassie would be appalled. What if some of these Yeerks were a part of the peace movement?  
  
In every war, there are casualties, Cassie.  
  
I punched the heat button. A sucking sound started up. It didn't sound like a heater. It sounded like water being drained from a bathtub. The water began to swirl around, down a central hole. Into a pipe. The Yeerks were being evacuated.  
  
"No!" I yelled, banging my fists against the side of the Jacuzzi. "No, no, no!!" It wasn't fair! They were mine! I should have been allowed to take them down!  
  
The last of the water sucked down through the hole. It slid shut with a smug click. Numbly, I stepped away from the empty tub. I stared blankly around. And that's when I saw them.  
  
Two big, thick metal doors. Set up behind the stage. The curtain that had been covering them had been pulled aside. Beside them, a green panel glowed with letters and numbers that a human never wrote. In front of them, the ground was torn up, as if the entire crowd had passed through them.  
  
Because the entire crowd had passed through them.  
  
I didn't have to test the strength of the doors. They were locked. No morph I had could break them down. And I knew where they led.  
  
They were doors to the Yeerk Pool. 


	23. Chapter Twenty Three

{Rachel, what are you . . . oh, no.} Tobias flared his wings, and landed on my shoulder. He stared at the door.  
  
I grated my teeth. Defeated. All of the adrenaline had left me, and I was hollow inside. Only useless anger rattled around in the emptiness. Jordan had to be down there. In the Yeerk pool. Even if we somehow, miraculously, managed to get her out, how would we explain what she had seen? She would know the truth.  
  
And I really didn't want her knowing the truth.  
  
"Should I try to break it down?" I asked. I wanted to be told what to do.  
  
{No, there's gotta be a biofilter,} Tobias replied. {But don't worry. As soon as Jake comes, we'll find another way in.}  
  
Oh, good. Jake was coming. Jake would pretend to know what to do.  
  
We looked at the door helplessly.  
  
"Let's go let Mary Sue out," I said, after a while. There wasn't much else we could do. Tobias launched himself into the air. I picked my way through the broken glass and debris. Back out through the gate again. I was getting to hate that gate.  
  
When I had been in elephant morph, it had felt like I gave the mailbox a very gentle squeeze. But I sat there, trying to pry open the lid for a good five minutes without success. It gave me some outlet for my pent-up anger, though. I cut myself a few times on the sharp, twisted aluminum. Fine. It would go away when I morphed whatever Jake told me to morph.  
  
{Here they come,} Tobias said. A few seconds later, I heard the whirr of bikes being ridden quickly. I dropped the mailbox, and charged out to the road.  
  
"Hey! Over here!" I yelled.  
  
Jake, Marco, and Cassie pulled their bikes up sharply. Cassie staggered onto the pavement. She had ridden the farthest, all the way out from her farm. She sat down on the curb to catch her breath. Ax, in harrier morph, fluttered down to rest in a tree.  
  
"What's up," Jake snapped, in the same way a general might bark "status!"  
  
{Jake, we've got what looks like a door to the Yeerk pool beside Megan's house,} Tobias said quickly. {The whole party went through it. Including Jordan.}  
  
"Wait. Hang on. Fill me in here," Marco said. "Because last time I heard, the plan was for us to stop Jordan coming to this party at all. Why are we talking about doors to Yeerk pools?"  
  
"Mom said Jordan couldn't come to the party," I said. "But I figured she would sneak out anyway, and I was going to stop her."  
  
"And you didn't do that . . . why?" Marco asked.  
  
"Because the best laid plans of mice and men went awry," Cassie said quietly. "Jake, what do we do?"  
  
Cassie knows people. She knows me. She knew that if I had been forced to tell them why I had failed, I would lie rather than confess any further weakness on my part. And she knew that everybody would know I had lied, which would have only made me more guilty. So, instead, she turned things back over to Jake.  
  
Who we all hoped had a plan.  
  
{Let me out of here,} Mary Sue complained.  
  
"What was that?" Marco asked.  
  
"Mary Sue," I said. "I locked her up for her own good."  
  
Jake set his jaw, and looked at Tobias. "Do we know of any accessible entrances to the Yeerk pool?"  
  
{All of the Yeerk-made entrances have bio-filters, Jake. And the batcave has long since been plugged.}  
  
Cassie must have caught something in his voice that the rest of us missed. Some hesitation. "Isn't there any other way in?" she asked.  
  
He hesitated. {Well . . . sort of . . . it's not really an entrance. At least, not yet.}  
  
{Tobias, perhaps you had better explain,} Ax said. He definitely put it nicer than I would have.  
  
{The Yeerks have been constructing a tunnel beside a church, but it doesn't connect all the way through yet, and they've got a twenty-four hour guard. We could try to charge them down, but we'd still have to dig at least forty feet.}  
  
"We don't have time for that!" I said. "They could be infesting Jordan right now!"  
  
"I know that, Rachel," Jake replied evenly.  
  
"We have to DO something!" I yelled.  
  
"I know that, too." He held his head, willing an idea to come.  
  
I could feel the seconds ticking away. Who knew what was occuring behind that inscrutable door. If Jordan was already being led to the pier. If she was already screaming as a Yeerk worked its way into her brain.  
  
{Rachel, open this container,} Mary Sue ordered me.  
  
Jake looked up. "Rachel, go let her out of whatever you put her in. Ax, examine that door. Any chance we can break through?"  
  
Glowering I darted into the trees, snagged the mailbox, and came back out onto the street.   
  
{I just checked, Prince Jake. The lock on the door is quite secure. As is the gleet biofilter set up around it. Both are Andalite technology, of course,} he added as an afterthought.  
  
"Ax! We don't care if it's Andalite technology, Yeerk technology, French technology, Eskimo technology, or silly string!" Marco exclaimed. "Can we get through or not?"  
  
{No.}  
  
No. Just . . . no.  
  
A heavy quiet fell. We were a strange and silent group, standing in our bare feet on a darkened suburban road. We were out of ideas. Beaten by a door.  
  
The mailbox finally snapped open, and I immediately felt a tickling sensation as Mary Sue scampered onto my arm. {You shall pay dearly for imprisoning a female of the Helmacron Empire,} she threatened me. I didn't respond.  
  
Marco broke the stillness. "So, for two million dollars, nobody has any ideas how to get into the Yeerk pool?"  
  
{You need to get into the Yeerk pool?} Mary Sue sounded surprised. {That's simple enough.}  
  
We all stared at the miniscule alien on my arm.  
  
"What do you mean, 'simple enough?'" I demanded sharply.  
  
Mary Sue laughed as if we were all very slow students. {Why, we'll just . . . What, do none of you understand what it means that I am a heretic?} 


	24. Chapter Twenty Four

"No, Mary Sue," Cassie said. "We don't know what it means that you're a heretic. Tell us."  
  
Mary Sue looked up at us, then shifted her posture. She liked an audience. {The Helmacron Empire has decided I am a heretic because of my belief in things that go against The Documented Truth.}  
  
{The Documented Truth?} Tobias echoed.  
  
{Yes. The combined knowledge, logic, and determinations of the Helmacron Empire.}  
  
"All one page of it," Marco muttered snidely. I glared at him. We really didn't need interruptions right now. Jordan was in danger, maybe already infested. I willed Mary Sue to talk fast. I might as well have willed a rhino to tapdance.  
  
{Naturally, The Documented Truth is updated quite frequently. Facts added, removed, and altered appropriate to the mandate of the Helmacron Imperial Research Facilities.}  
  
{Facts are altered?} Ax repeated.  
  
{Of course,} Mary Sue said in surprise. {If we did not frequently alter our facts, we would never be able to correctly document the entire known universe.}  
  
"Of course not," Cassie soothed. "Go on." She glanced at me. Knew how anxious I was. I gritted my teeth and waited.  
  
{Currently, The Documented Truth shows that the World Desolator was destroyed on its mission to Earth, and that is why it has never returned.}  
  
"Wait, back up," Jake said. "What's the World Desolator?"  
  
'Don't back up. Get to the point!' I wanted to scream. But Mary Sue held the cards at the moment. If she had a way to bust into the Yeerk pool, I would just have to keep my cool.  
  
That's not what I'm best at.  
  
{What is the -- do you massively oversized creatures know nothing?} Mary Sue protested. {The World Desolator was one of the Helmacron Empire's prized new ships. Smaller than others, yet able to travel through Z-space, with all the power and weaponry of a fully armed Eradicator class vessel!}  
  
"And it was sent to Earth?" I prompted impatiently.  
  
{That is correct. To pulverize your species into submission.}  
  
Marco snorted, then choked quietly. I clenched and unclenched my fist.  
  
"But The Documented Truth says that it we destroyed it," Cassie said.  
  
{No! The Documented Truth would never state anything so ludicrous, or people might lose faith in it! The Documented Truth currently shows that the World Desolator was crushed by a black hole that formed directly in its flight path, then vanished again without a trace.}  
  
"Freak black holes appearing out of nowhere and vanishing without a trace is more believable than some kid taking a pop at this ship with his BB gun?" Marco said, sitting up. "Yeah, okay, that makes sense."  
  
{Yes,} Mary Sue said. {That's just it. It makes perfect sense. Which led me to doubt the veracity of the statement. I took my life in my hands and researched what happened to the World Desolator. Denying The Documented Truth is a serious crime.}  
  
"Punishable by exile to Earth," Jake said.  
  
{Death is too honorable of a punishment for such an action,} Mary Sue acknowledged. {At any rate, I performed extended research, and discovered the true fate of the World Desolator. When I began telling others about my findings, I was arrested and exiled in disgrace. And you know my story from that point.}  
  
"Well, that's just beautiful. Thanks for sharing. HOW DOES THIS HELP US SAVE JORDAN!?" I yelled, knocking Mary Sue over with my breath. Disgusted, I slid her into Cassie's hands. We hadn't been looking for her autobiography, we needed help!  
  
Jake shot me a warning glance, then returned his attention to Mary Sue. "You said you could get us into the Yeerk pool."  
  
{Oh. Yes. My research concluded that the World Desolator must be on Earth. The crew had evidenced many strange psychological factors. It is my belief that the the World Desolator actually defected from the Helmacron Empire. It is a renegade ship, and it is currently hiding on this planet.}  
  
{So?} Tobias asked.  
  
{Any Helmacron ship could easily gain access to a Yeerk pool complex.}  
  
I stopped pacing.  
  
Marco straightened. "Wait. Are you saying what I think? We're talking about calling up the Helmacrons for reinforcements?"  
  
I looked at Jake. He had this funny half-smile on his face. "Yeah, Marco. I think that's what we're doing."  
  
"That's insane," Marco said flatly. "Their ships are the size of soda bottles. They have absolutely no fear, in a very idiotic, subconscious deathwish kind of way. They're a species of lunatic, leader-murdering, mini-feminists!"  
  
{I object! Do I deride your species in your presence?} Mary Sue cried.  
  
{Yeah,} Tobias said. {All the time.}  
  
"Will the World Desolator help us?" Jake asked Mary Sue.  
  
{If helping you would hurt the Yeerks.}  
  
Jake nodded. My heart leaped up into my throat.  
  
"How do we get in contact with them?" Cassie asked.  
  
{I will instruct you how to use a satellite-based vocal communication device to break into Helmacron frequencies.}  
  
{You need a cell phone,} Tobias interperated. {Check.} He spread his wings, and swooped into the night air.  
  
{Once they arrive, it will be necessary for you to be resized in order to fit into the spacecraft.}  
  
Jake nodded. I could see the wheels turning in his head. "We shrink, tunnel in, sneak over to Jordan's cage, shrink her, load her on, get out. It works."  
  
Ax nodded his agreement. {Indeed. In fact, it is one of the best methods of Yeerk pool infiltration we have discovered to date.}  
  
Adrenaline was beginning to flood back into my system. We were going to do it. We had a way of beating the Yeerks. We had allies. Sort of. "Teaming up with the craziest species in the galaxy to bust some Yeerk heads," I laughed, feeling a little dizzy from the energy that was beginning to hit my system.  
  
"Oh, go ahead and say it, Rachel," Marco said.  
  
I grinned. "Let's do it." 


	25. Chapter Twenty Five

Tobias came back in almost no time, and dropped a cell phone into Jake's hands. {There you go,} he said. {Talk as long as you want. That's a Verizon phone. Unlimited nights and weekends. It's after nine o'clock, right?}  
  
"How'd you get a phone so fast?" Jake asked in suspicion.  
  
Tobias swooped low, and landed delicately on a tree branch. {We've got an emergency here, right? I'll return it as soon as we're done.}  
  
Jake opened his mouth as if to press the point. He closed it and looked at Mary Sue. "All right, you've got a cell phone. What else do you need?"  
  
{I shall need the assistance of Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill in order to reprogram the device.}  
  
Ax, still in harrier morph, straightened up a little at that. He liked being called on for his technical skill. And I think he liked being called by his full name.  
  
"How soon can you make the call?" Jake asked.  
  
{Sooner if we are able to work without interruption.}  
  
Jake took the hint. "Ax, get as deep into the trees as you can. Demorph, and help her out. Tobias, keep an eye out for anybody coming."  
  
As soon as Tobias was airborne and Ax had demorphed, I handed Mary Sue over and stepped out onto Megan's side of the road, staring blankly at her house. I felt numb. Like I should be doing something. But I was forced to inaction, and the waiting made me stupid. I couldn't think clearly. I just looked at the house.  
  
{We'll get her out,} Tobias assured me from the sky.  
  
I felt guilty. I hadn't even clearly been thinking about Jordan. I felt like I couldn't clearly think about anything. My mind was a beehive - busy, but jammed with thoughts and emotions too numerous to sort out. I held my head and groaned.  
  
Cassie sat down next to me. She didn't say anything. Just sat and looked at the house.  
  
I looked at her. She was waiting for me to talk. "I don't know, Cassie. I don't know what to do."  
  
I guess she knew what was going on with me. She usually does. She had an answer ready for me. "Do one thing at a time, Rachel. Concentrate on the job in front of you. Do it. Move on to the next one. Don't think about the whole thing."  
  
I nodded. That made sense. Right now we had to get the World Desolator here. If I could just concentrate on that, I could make it. I wouldn't fall apart if I concentrated.  
  
"Right. Right."  
  
"Baby steps, sir," Cassie said, in a deep, throaty voice. "Baaaaaby steps."  
  
I laughed a little at that. "We are cosmic knowledge fish," I quoted from the same movie.  
  
"We are highly eevolved beeeings," we chorused. I looked at her. She looked at me. We both cracked up. I guess it was the tension, and the silliness of quoting "Muppets From Space" right then. But we just sat and laughed for a little while.  
  
When we caught our breath, Cassie leaned against me. "Wouldn't it be nice if aliens were really all like Gonzo?"  
  
"I dunno," I said. "The Helmacrons come close to being weird enough, and look how big of a pain they are."  
  
{Prince Jake, everyone, we have completed the call.}  
  
We exchanged a look, then stood and gathered with the others around Ax and Mary Sue. "Well?" Jake said.  
  
{The ship was being ingested by a large carnivorous plant in the South American jungles. They managed to break free of its grasp, and they'll be here in five of your minutes.}  
  
"Ooookay," Jake said. "When I thought life couldn't get any weirder..."  
  
"Ax," Marco began.  
  
{Oh, and Prince Jake,} Ax said, cutting Marco off before he could lecture him about just whose minutes they were, {I am afraid we will not be able to return this telephone to its original owner. The reprogramming was quite extensive. I believe if he attempted to call anybody, he would send out a general subspace distress signal.}  
  
"Great. Now we have to buy the kid a replacement."  
  
Marco shook his head. "Jake, Jake, Jake. Look at this phone. This is a nice phone. The kid's gotta have it insured."  
  
Jake looked at Cassie. I could see he didn't really want to buy a new phone.  
  
"Let it drop, Jake. Marco's probably right," I said.  
  
It took us almost the full five minutes before Jake's conscience was sufficiently soothed to keep the phone. We've made a policy out of not stealing from regular humans. But, as Tobias said, this *was* an emergency.  
  
{One thing I should mention,} Mary Sue said, {is that you should not interrupt their entering speech. It's very rude to do so, they might take offense.}  
  
"Got it," Jake said.  
  
Vreeeeeeeeem! A tiny ship, about the size of a pill bottle, with a death's-head bridge shot into the trees, then stopped short about a foot from Ax's head.  
  
"Cue the insanity," Marco murmured.  
  
{GREETINGS, INGLORIOUS HUMANS, ANDALITE, AND SENTIENT BIRD OF THE TRANSFORMING POWER, AND ALSO MIRIXZU, THE OUTCAST HERETIC!!} screamed a thoughtspeak voice from inside the ship. We all winced and looked at each other. We couldn't interrupt. But if any Yeerk had heard that, we were in some serious trouble. {WE, THE MIND-NUMBINGLY VALIENT CREW OF THE WORLD DESOLATOR HAVE COME IN RESPONSE TO YOUR PLEA FOR THE MIGHT OF THE HELMACRONS! WE HAVE COME TO AID YOU IN YOUR WORTHY QUEST TO ELIMINATE THE YEERK ABOMINATION!!}  
  
Jake looked down at Mary Sue. {Thank you, mighty crew!} she responded. {May I explain the situation in detail to your captain?}  
  
{THE CAPTAIN HAS NOT DENIED YOUR REQUEST,} was the shouted reply.  
  
Nobody mentioned the fact that it would have been really impossible for the captain to deny any request. Seeing as how the captain was chained to her command chair with nine or ten swords sticking out of her. All according to Helmacron tradition, of course. So Mary Sue explained the situation. Helmacron style. Which meant that after ten minutes were gone, two duels had erupted onboard the ship and pretty much everybody had been vigorously insulted. But the World Desolator got the message.  
  
{May we be allowed to board the World Desolator?} Mary Sue asked, after they had agreed to help us out.  
  
{THE CAPTAIN HAS NOT DENIED YOUR REQUEST. DISGUSTINGLY MASSIVE CREATURES, PREPARE YOURSELVES!!}  
  
We heard a noise we had all heard before, and then the floor began to fall up towards us. Yes, I know that sounds weird. But shrinking is weird, and it's hard to explain. The best I can describe it is as skydiving. You know, how in all the cartoons, the ground keeps rushing up and up at the guy who's falling? That's about how it feels, only a little bit slower. And you can feel the ground underneath your feet the whole time. Like I've said, it's weird.  
  
I looked around at the others. We were all shrinking at the same rate, which added to the weirdness of it all.  
  
"Boy, oh boy," Marco said pleasantly, "just what I always wanted to do. Voluntarily shrink myself to the size of a dust speck and climb aboard a ship full of insane egotistical feminists."  
  
"Gee, Marco. I wouldn't have thought you'd notice any difference in your height." Despite my anxiety, or perhaps because of it, I still had the urge to tease Marco. Well, my anxiety and the fact that the pine needles that I had been standing on were now knee deep.  
  
"AHha. AHha. Hiss, put that on my luggage!" Marco commanded nobody as the needles shot up to shoulder height.  
  
{Somebody tell me he isn't quoting Disney's Robin Hood. I really need somebody to tell me that.}  
  
"The birdboy gets another gold star for catching the reference. Hey, are we done shrinking yet?"  
  
{You are,} Mary Sue confirmed. {And your hideousness is almost diminished at this more reasonable sight. You are still aesthetically objectionable, of course, but slightly less so.}  
  
Mary Sue stood there, the same height as us. She didn't look much different from other Helmacrons. Same four legs. Same teal-colored skin. Same triangular head with the barbed chin and gnashing mouthparts. Same pool-ball-like eyes resting on top of the ridiculously flat head.  
  
"Wish I could say the same for you," Marco said blandly.  
  
VREEEEEEEEEM. The World Desolator loomed above us. From this vantage point, it was definitely impressive. It prickled with weaponry, and cut a vast, threatening shape in the night air. I felt a surge of hope. With a ship like this . . .  
  
Then I remembered. The ship was about the size of a pinecone.   
  
But it was our only hope. And it was better than nothing.  
  
Probably.  
  
The ship nestled down in front of us. It was a lot like a good sci-fi movie. Plenty of hissing hydraulics, steam being emitted, glowing hoverpads switching on and off. Marco softly ground out the Imperial March as the hatch slowly opened. Three Helmacrons stood there, gleaming in their silvery uniforms. {Greetings, appropriately resized, yet still abysmally foolish and ignorant giants and Mirixzu the Heretic. You may board when the grovelling ceremony is complete.}  
  
"Groveling ceremony?" I repeated in disbelief.  
  
"It's a piece of cake," Marco assured me. "Just follow my lead."   
  
Apparently, however, Mary Sue had other ideas. {We will not grovel. We bring aboard a captain of our own, and we will grovel only to her.}  
  
"Him," Jake muttered.  
  
The Helmacrons muttered and "neeped" at that for a few seconds. At last, the one who did the most talking looked disparagingly down at Mary Sue. {If you have the base audacity to bring a second captain onto a ship that already has a commander, you had best produce her immediately, so that we may ascertain whether she is worthy of licking our captain's boots. To say nothing of keeping you from traditional and appropriate grovelling. Well, where is she?}  
  
"*He* is right here," Jake said loudly, stepping forward.  
  
She looked at him. {Very well. But where is the captain?}  
  
"I'm the captain," Jake announced.  
  
The Helmacrons stared at him.  
  
"Neep!" one said.  
  
The lead Helmacron looked blankly at Mary Sue. {Your captain is a live male?}  
  
The Helmacron on the left got very excited, and started shouting. {Outrage! Shock! Abomination! Vile creature who dares to appear as one of the glorious rulers of the galaxy, but grovels to scum!!}  
  
Mary Sue hung her head, digging her front left foot into the pine needles, obviously embarrassed. {The gender and species is regrettable, and unavoidable. These humans have very strange customs.} She looked up, and locked eyes with the lead Helmacron. {But as for the rest of it . . . }  
  
The other Helmacrons nodded their agreement.  
  
Sccchiiiiissshck!  
  
The sound of metal scraping on metal as the aliens drew rapiers from scabbards.  
  
Mary Sue turned pleasantly towards my cousin. {Allow us to kill you with honor, Jake. It is your duty as captain to be infallible.} 


	26. Chapter Twenty Six

Let's review the bidding, shall we?  
  
My kid sister had been dragged underground, down to the Yeerk pool, where, as far as I knew, she was already infested. We had called a renegade Helmacron ship for help. They showed up, and we all got seriously small. And now we were surrounded by Helmacrons who seemed dead set on killing Jake so that he could be a better leader.  
  
But, like Cassie said, focus on one task at a time.  
  
Like, the task of seriously kicking Helmacron booty. And I was so ticked, I didn't even need a morph to do it.  
  
The thing about the Helmacron rapiers is, they're only pointy on the end. You can grab them on the sides just fine. So I did.  
  
{Ah! What are you doing, idiot human!?}  
  
I was superstrong. That comes with the territory of being tiny. The Helmacron who asked that particular question was in midair while she asked it. I seriously needed to vent some steam, and the Helmacrons were kindly helping me out.  
  
{Aiieeee!! She is beserk!}  
  
I grabbed the second Helmacron by all four legs, and swung her around a few times.  
  
"RACHEL!" Jake was yelling. "Put her down!"  
  
{Actually . . . }  
  
I obeyed Jake, and put the Helmacron down. Well, more like threw her down. I wasn't very gentle. I was getting warmed up to go for the third one when a few more of the crew showed up. That was when I first noticed that the Helmacrons had actually shrunk us so we were a good deal smaller than they were. Like, we were flyers on the dance team, and they were the football players. I had lost the element of surprise, and I didn't have much else going for me than sheer frustration. But I still had plenty of that.  
  
"Let me go, you big jerk!" I yelled. "Ow, my arm! Aaaarrrrrrggghhh!!"  
  
"Good diplomacy, Rachel," Marco said. "Really great."  
  
I looked at the others. They were surrounded, held on all sides by large, dangerous looking Helmacrons. Jake shook his head slowly at me.  
  
'WHAT?' I mouthed sharply.  
  
The lead Helmacron was just standing there, her big eyes fixed on me. {Mary Sue the Heretic,} she said slowly.  
  
{Yes?}  
  
{You have villainously lied to us.}  
  
{No! I swear on the six knees of Vlagbeet! We do indeed require your assistance to vanquish the despicable Yeerks!}  
  
{Not about that. You said, and I must now presume this to have been an ill-favored jest, that this male was your captain. But it is evident that this strong female is in fact the boldest and most worthy of your entire crew.}  
  
My head snapped up. "What?" I asked.  
  
{We saw through your deception immediately, of course. It is evident that you, female of the pale follicles, are the captain of this group, and none other.}  
  
"No way," I said. "I'm -- "  
  
"Way too modest!" Marco said, stepping forward. "They figured it out, Captain Rachel. We'd better just admit it. Right, fellow crewmember Jake?" he asked pointedly.  
  
Jake stared for a second. Then, it clicked for him about the same time it did for me. If the Helmacrons were accepting any of us as a legitimate captain, that was a step in the right direction. "Um . . . right!" he affirmed. "Yeah. She's the captain."  
  
{And you're not allowed to kill her, either,} Tobias said.  
  
The lead Helmacron looked disappointed, but soothed. {We will kill her if she is in danger of making any mistakes. But not before that. We had to kill the other because he was male, which was a mistake from the outset.} She blinked pleasantly at me. {Know, Captain of the Pathetic-But-Ironically-Allied-With-The-Almighty-Helmacrons-Human-Crew, that should it appear that you are about to make an erroneous decision, your death will be swift, yet surprisingly painful.}  
  
"Great." I looked at Jake. He nodded very slightly. Gave me permission to be captain.  
  
Which, I guess, meant that he was also giving me permission to die if I made a bad call.  
  
Gee, thanks, cousin.  
  
The Helmacrons released me. "Okay," I said. "Let's get this party started."  
  
Lifting my chin as befit the captain of the human crew, I led the other Animorphs onto the ship. The door hissed shut behind us. The lights took a few seconds to come on.  
  
"Next stop," Marco said, while we were still in the dark, "total insanity. All aboard." 


	27. Chapter Twenty Seven

{All systems are functioning flawlessly. Engine, weapons, and shields are all at awe-inspiring power levels. We are fully prepared for devestation.}  
  
"Now that's what I call a status report," Marco said approvingly.  
  
I stood on the bridge of the Helmacron ship. The crew had agreed to follow my orders unless I made an error or disagreed with their own captain. And, as their captain wasn't exactly the chatty type, that meant that I was in command of the ship. And, so help me, I was loving it.  
  
"Launch the ship," I said with authority. "Take us down to the Yeerk pool."  
  
"NEEP! NEEP! NEEP!" cheered the crew.  
  
One right decision down. Five million to go.  
  
While the Helmacrons bustled around, flipping switches and pushing buttons, I thought over the hurried, whispered advice the others had given as we approached the bridge.  
  
{You must give general commands,} Mary Sue had urged. {Any specific misuse of a technical term could be your undoing. Just tell the crew what you want done, and let them do it.}  
  
"Keep us near you," Jake said. "You're the captain, they'll obey you. Keep in control." He didn't specify whether he meant in control of them, or in control of myself. I knew he meant both.  
  
"Don't get us killed," was Marco's advice.  
  
Now, on the bridge, I glanced sideways at the dead captain next to me, with six rapiers sticking through her chest.  
  
And I thought I was pressured to be perfect in school.  
  
I watched the viewscreen as we shot above the trees. We were in the air, we were speeding towards the church where we would use the half-constructed Yeerk tunnel to break through to the pool. We were doing something. Suburbia shot beneath us. A kid on a bike passed just twenty feet below us and never looked up . A new Tahoe ran a red light. A cat pounced on some rodent in the grass. And then the church loomed up in front of us. It was one of those big brown buildings, with a stubby, angular steeple nosing the sky. The pilot of our ship had no trouble spotting the tunnel. It was surrounded by orange cones, "Men At Work," signs, and construction equipment. There were a few construction workers out on late shifts, not doing much of anything.  
  
Then the viewscreen scanned them, and lit up the handguns at their side in neon orange.  
  
"This is really obvious," Cassie said, surprised. "What's their cover story for this?"  
  
{The church is supposed to be getting its sewage system repaired.}  
  
"So the Yeerks are linking themselves with sewage? That's good," Marco commented offhand.  
  
One of the Helmacrons turned. Stared at him. Blinked. Then started shrilling "SEET! SEET! SEET!"  
  
We all looked at Mary Sue in bewilderment. She shrugged slightly. {I did not think it was that especially good of a joke, myself.}  
  
"SEET! SEET! SEET!"  
  
"You mean she's laughing?" Marco asked.  
  
{Of course.}  
  
Marco shook his head. "Aliens."  
  
"SEET!"  
  
We hovered above the guards. I looked at Jake.  
  
'Gentle,' he mouthed.  
  
Great, that was real helpful. "Mary Sue," I said. "Your suggestions on how to take these guys out?"  
  
{Use the Helmacron Death Ray.}  
  
I frowned. "Any less lethal options? I'd like to slip in quietly."  
  
{We could shrink them.}  
  
I grinned. A few seconds later, the guards were seriously not a problem. And I promised Cassie that we would restore them to their proper size when we got back out.  
  
We plunged into the tunnel. It was a huge vertical shaft, for about forty feet straight down, covered with ladders, wires, and scaffolding. "What's all that?" I asked, pointing to the half-constructed . . . something . . . that clung to the side of the tunnel.  
  
{I think it's a freight elevator,} Tobias said. {You know, one of those kinds they haul heavy machinery up and down.}  
  
"Or thirty people at a time?" Cassie asked quietly.  
  
Tobias looked at her. {Yes.}  
  
Suddenly, the picture on the viewscreen stopped dead. Like a freeze frame of a movie. I guess we had reached the end of the tunnel.  
  
The Helmacron pilot turned to face me. {Shall we utterly obliterate this paltry obstruction and force our way into the Yeerk pool?} she asked.  
  
I looked at Jake. Subtly, he held his thumb and forefinger an inch apart.  
  
"No. The Yeerks would like it if we finished their job early for them," I said. "If we blow up the wall, it will only help them. Carve a small hole, only big enough for our ship to go through."  
  
The pilot blinked, then looked at the other Helmacrons. {It is wisdom,} she said, sounding astonished.  
  
{From a human,} another said.  
  
{A live human.}  
  
They all three stared at me.  
  
{I suggest you assert your dominance now,} Mary Sue said in private thoughtspeech.  
  
I drew myself up to my full height - all one-fifteenth inch of me. "Of course it is! I am the captain! Proceed with your task!"  
  
{Initiating the Dread Cannon of Sublime Decimation!} cried the weapons officer.  
  
"Is that its real name?" Jake asked Mary Sue.  
  
{Of course. The DCSD is a standard feature on all new Helmacron ships.}  
  
A silly grin spread over my face. "I think I'm really beginning to like you Helmacrons."  
  
The cannon was activated. Pulsing red energy shot from the ship. A hole the size of our ship appeared in the wall. We began moving forward. As we went, we picked up speed. The ground that the Yeerks were taking weeks to dig through melted like butter before our cannon. It felt really, really good to have the technological edge on them for once. We sped through our tunnel, the viewscreen brilliant red from the cannon's light. It only took us about ten seconds to break through.  
  
Then we were above the Yeerk pool. It looked seriously big.  
  
And right in front of us, about the size of Rhode Island, hovered a very angry hunter-seeker droid. It scanned us. Then its guns, bigger than our whole ship, locked on to us. 


	28. Chapter Twenty Eight

"Shoot it!" I yelled.  
  
Twin red beams lanced out from the nose of our ship into the heart of the hunter-seeker. Twin pin-prick holes appeared its sleek metal surface. Then it opened fire.  
  
"Dodge, dodge, dodge!" I shouted. The pilots did just that. The viewscreen swung wildly around as we shot into the thick air above the Yeerk pool. The hunter-seeker bore down on us like an angry moon. It was built for speed, just like our ship. We wouldn't be able to outrun it. Not without attracting some serious attention.  
  
More Helmacrons had poured onto the bridge from all over the ship. The room was filled with Helmacrons running from station to station. I couldn't hear myself over their cries of "NEEP! NEEP!" and the blaring alarms that filled the air  
  
"Shoot it again!" I shouted. We did. Again, not enough damage. I looked at Jake in desperation.   
"Shrink it, then shoot!" he hissed.  
  
"Fire the shrinking ray, shoot it when it's small!" A flash as we fired the ray. Then a truly beautiful sight. The hunter-seeker dwindled in size. "Kill it!" We continued to dance around the ever-diminishing droid. It finally exploded when it was about twice the size of our ship.  
  
The bridge breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
ATTENTION! COWARDLY ENEMY IN CLOSE PROXIMITY! ALL BRAVE HELMACRON WARRIORS, DRAW YOUR RAPIERS AND THEIR BLOOD! ATTENTION! COWARDLY ENEMY IN CLOSE PROXIMITY!   
  
"Somebody shut that stupid alarm off!" I snapped.  
  
ALL BRAVE HELMACRON WARRIORS, DRAWWww -- The voice slurred and fell silent.  
  
"And when you're finished, bring your pictures to the briiiiddggge."  
  
"Shut up, Marco." I tried to think back to the few Star Trek shows I had watched. "Damage report!"  
  
No damage was sustained to the undefeatable World Desolator, Captain. We are still fully prepared to wreak our terrible vengeance upon the Yeerk foe.   
  
"Did they see us fighting the droid?"  
  
The pitiful Yeerks did not raise their gaze from their vile, mundane tasks to envisage our glorious victory against their titan dreadnought.   
  
"That's a no."  
  
Correct.   
  
I took a deep breath. "Okay," I said. Crisis one over. "Scan for Jordan."  
  
There are a multitude of similar humans in this complex, Captain. Which one is Jordan? a Helmacron inquired.  
  
I looked at Jake. Jake looked at Ax. Scan the Captain. Isolate her human DNA from the various animal DNA patterns in her bloodstream. Jordan is her sister. There will be many genetic similarities, he announced.  
  
The Helmacrons conferred together in rapid, excited thoughtspeech, then aimed an instrument that looked a little too much like a gun at my head. Do not twitch, they instructed gravely. I held very still. After a moment, the instrument beeped, and they excitedly plugged it into the wall.  
  
"What, did it run out of batteries?"  
  
"Shut up, Marco."  
  
"Hey, what else am I supposed to do?" he muttered, while the Helmacrons were excitedly clustered around the panel. "I'm riding on a ship crewed by insane female egotistical aliens, captained by the Mistress of Mayhem herself. Like I have anything to contribute besides my razor wit?"  
  
I rolled my eyes, but was saved from having to reply by the report from Mary Sue. We have located Jordan, Captain. She is currently in a holding cage.   
  
Hot blood pounded in my ears. If she was in a cage, that meant she hadn't been infested yet. There was still time. "Let's do it."  
  
Let's do it? the Helmacrons echoed. They looked at each other cluelessly.   
  
"Let's get in there, rescue a lot of innocent people, and squish some slugs," I translated, my eyes locked on the viewscreen.  
  
"NEEP! NEEP! NEEP!" The Helmacrons looked at each other delightedly. Let us do it! they shouted gleefully. Let us do it!   
  
Tobias turned his intense raptor gaze at me. Rachel, you did not just teach the Helmacrons to say "Let's do it."   
  
Cassie grinned. "She did."  
  
Marco stared at the ceiling. "Why?" he whimpered. "Why me?"  
  
Let us DO it! the Helmacrons shouted. The ship shot forward like it had been fired from a gun. The viewscreen became an unreadable blur.  
  
"Pilot! Set us down on the top of the cage, at the back! Don't let anybody see us land!"  
  
It is done, Captain. The ship slowed down, the viewscreen panned around, and I felt the ship buckle gently as the landing struts made contact. We roosted on top of an intersection of two steel pipes on top of the cave. As far as I could tell, not a soul had seen us come down.  
  
"Okay," I turned to Mary Sue. "How many extra passengers can we fit aboard?"  
  
After shrinking to Helmacron height? Mary Sue asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
She turned expectantly to one of the other Helmacrons, who considered for a moment or two. Thirty-eight.   
  
"And how many people are in the cage?"  
  
Fifty-seven.   
  
Cassie frowned. "Not good enough. We have to get them all."  
  
"I know, Cassie," I said. "Mary Sue, can we shrink them smaller than Helmacron height?"  
  
Of course.   
  
"Okay. We'll shrink them all to half-Helmacron height, and load them up. With any luck, we'll be out of here before the Yeerks notice they're missing. If they do notice, we just blast our way out." I tried to ignore the disturbing hope in the back of my mind that they would notice.  
  
"Hold on!" Marco objected. "We're talking about loading fifty-seven people onto this ship? Jake, that means fifty-seven people who'll see us! That's fifty-seven witnesses who know we teamed up with the Helmacrons to rescue them! That's fifty-seven security breaches, Jake!"  
  
"Rachel's the captain," Jake said. He stared at me. He knew he couldn't make a suggestion out loud. Taking orders from a male would have made me look like a weak leader. And that could be lethal in this crowd. But he had a plan. "If only," he said, "there were some way to make it look like we weren't here. Like there were only Helmacrons on board."  
  
The Helmacrons looked from him to me in puzzlement. I looked at Jake with the same. What was he talking about? Hiding? Tobias figured it out first. He wants you to order us to morph, Rachel, he said privately. Morph Helmacron.   
  
I stared at Jake. My cousin was a genius. A totally insane genius.  
  
Marco was going to love this. 


	29. Chapter Twenty Nine

I explained the plan to the crew. Their reaction was predictably Helmacron.  
  
You wish to become Helmacrons. That is, of course, understandable. Species have been slavishly longing after our perfect forms for millenia.   
  
Marco's reaction was also predictable. Fortunately, he kept it to dry heaves. The Helmacron crew voluntarily stepped forward, offering their DNA. I glanced at Cassie. I could see she had misgivings about the plan, but as the Helmacrons had willingly agreed, there wasn't much she could say.  
  
All Helmacron body-donators should leave the bridge after you have acquired their DNA, in order to minimalize confusion, Mary Sue suggested privately.  
  
I nodded, and repeated her words in an authoritarian tone.  
  
The largest Helmacron female stood in front of me. I guess I got prime pick, since I was Captain. Helmacrons really aren't the most attractive people in the galaxy. I don't know, call me crazy, but something about pool-ball eyes on a flat, cone-shaped head, with a barbed chin and insectoid mouthparts, four legs, and teal skin all combined to a rather unappealing whole. This one was no exception. If anything, she was more exxageratedly Helmacron than the others - her mouthparts were larger, her eyes bulged farther from her head than those of the others.  
  
Captain, I am Zhrimka. It is my honor to share my DNA with you.   
  
I nodded, reached forward, and touched her arm. I noticed for the first time that Helmacron skin feels like ClingWrap. I focused on her. Watched as her eyes unfocused and she became limp. I looked around the room. Tobias clung to the shoulder of a Helmacron in the acquiring trance. Ax had his fingers on the chest of another. Jake, Marco, and Cassie nodded at me. The other Helmacrons looked on with eager interest and concern.  
  
We stepped back, and waited for the Helmacrons to snap out of it. I noticed that it took them a little bit longer than most species. When they had all straightened up, I said, "We're done. Go and perform your duties elsewhere."  
  
Obediently, they swiveled on their four legs and trotted off the bridge. I looked around at the others. They all looked about as nervous as I felt. We knew that Helmacrons had some pretty powerful instincts, and this was the first time we had ever morphed their species. We were in for a wild ride.  
  
I closed my eyes, and began to morph.  
  
Flllllltttkkk.  
  
I felt my skin crinkle. I couldn't help it. I opened my eyes, and looked at my now-teal skin. Prodded it with a finger. It felt like ClingWrap. My finger had changed, too. It was longer, slenderer, thicker in the middle, and flatter. It was the finger of a Helmacron. I focused on the morph. I was very grateful I couldn't see the changes I could feel.  
  
Skrrrrrrtch.  
  
I felt my face split vertically from the bottom of my nose to my chin. The four segments of my mouth stretched and squished. My tongue dissolved, and I felt tiny spikes grow inside of my mouth. My gag reflex kicked in, but just as I was about to start choking, my throat slipped and my vocal chords disappeared. I felt my internal organs sloshing around, twisting. Bones crunched and changed shape radically.  
  
I looked around at the others. Marco's eyes were crawling up his face, ballooning out as they reached the top of his head. Oh, this is pleasant, he commented privately.  
  
Jake had four legs. Ax had lost his tail and become bald. Tobias was a confused lump of blue feathers and thin, extending limbs. Even Cassie couldn't make the morph attractive, as her chin split apart and became a number of sharp barbs.  
  
My insides finished rearranging themselves with a schlooorrpt.  
  
I then grew my other two legs in an extremely unattractive way. Stop laughing, Marco, I growled. My morph is bigger than yours.   
  
It sure is! he choked. His laugh came out in the high-pitched "SEET! SEET!" of his morph.  
  
Then my vision swam, shifted colors, and everything was confused as my eyes trickled upwards and became the Helmacron billiard-ball eyes. I was surprised how much taller it made me feel.  
  
I looked around, down at myself, at the others. The changes seemed to be complete. I waited for something more, but there was nothing.  
  
Well, Tobias said. That was easy.   
  
Are you finished? Mary Sue asked tentatively.  
  
Of course we are! I laughed. I mean, come on, if anybody's good at morphing, it's us.   
  
We are pretty amazing, Cassie agreed.  
  
Pretty amazing? Marco snorted. Try totally awesome on for size! I mean, I figured I would be fighting all these instincts, but I so totally have this under control!   
  
No kidding, Jake said. Man, those Yeerks don't have a chance. I'd like to see any of them morph Helmacron and not have problems with its instincts!   
  
"SEET!" I shrilled. Not likely. Stupid Yeerks. Who do they think they are, going up against us? We're so going to crush them!   
  
Mary Sue looked at us, a confused expression on her face. Hey, I could read Helmacron facial expressions! I looked around, and realized that I could see what each Helmacron in the room was thinking, just by their eyes. I was such an amazing natural at this.  
  
Ax nodded. I concur, Rachel! The Yeerks have no chance of survival against such opponents as us!   
  
Just think of how humiliated Visser Three will be when we kick his butt in Helmacron morph!   
  
Let's laugh long and hard at him first, Cassie suggested. I'd love to see the expression on his idiotic Andalite face!   
  
Mary Sue frowned. Captain, perhaps we should --   
  
Ah! The prisoners! Of course. I turned to regard the viewscreen. Why are we hiding here on top of the cage? We should announce our presence! We can take on these Yeerks! None of them have a ship. They're no match for us.   
  
Mary Sue's eyes widened. Captain, I'm not sure that --   
  
Don't argue with me, Heretic! I snapped, suddenly filled with outrage that she questioned my orders. I said, announce our presence!   
  
You're making a mistake, she hissed in private thoughtspeech.  
  
HOW DARE YOU!? I screamed. I'm the CAPTAIN!! Obey me or die! The rest of the Helmacrons looked in confusion from Mary Sue to me. What were they all, stupid? I was the captain! I couldn't make a mistake! I had figured out all of the angles! The Yeerks weren't even a problem! We can end this war right here, right now! Let us destroy this pitiful pool and have done with it!   
  
I swiveled, demanding support from my subordinates. Jake, Ax, Tobias, and Marco nodded their agreement. Cassie looked disturbed. The real Helmacrons continued simply gaping at each other.  
  
Why are you waiting!? I have spoken!! I am the captain! I am infallible! I am perfect! You shall obey my orders!   
  
One by one, the Helmacrons drew their rapiers from their sheaths.   
  
Yes! I shouted. Kill the Heretic! She contradicted the captain, she must die! I worked my mouthparts angrily.  
  
Oh, my gosh, Cassie breathed. Rachel! The instincts! You've got the Helmacron instincts! We all do!   
  
Silence, Cassie! Ax barked. We are in perfect control of our faculties!   
  
I shook my head at Cassie. So weak. She might have fallen prey to the Helmacron instincts, but not me. I was far too skilled, too strong to ever make that mistake. If Cassie had, maybe we should kill her after Mary Sue was dead. I wasn't about to give in to Helmacron arrogance, to Helmacron violence. Only the perfect and the strongest should be allowed to live.  
  
Which meant that, inevitably, I'd be the only one left standing. And that was just fine with me. 


End file.
